apology to a wife betrayed

By BetaWolfinVA

sorry that i couldn't tell you how i felt in person
i do not deserve you
i do not know how i feel
i only know that i am constantly lonely
-
i cannot see us reaching thirty years
i can barely see us continuing for thirty days
you deserve someone that can love you with a whole heart
perhaps someone living in reston
-
every time i bought something for my self
i would think about the bills, get angry about the
monthly eight hundred fifty for your sisters house
and do it any way
-
i would spend nights talking to people i would never see
i was lonely and had found friends
i was not expecting what happened
i did not expect to hurt you again
-
i did not recognize the danger signs
i barely know my self
maybe therapy will tell me the truth
you need to be happy, you need to be free

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.

Published on Wednesday, October 31, 2012. Filed under: "Depressed" and "Poetry"

Author's Note:

Well, my wife found one of my blog posts, talkign about a failed online relationship... i don't know whats going to happen... why the heck would *she* beg *me* not to leave?

Comments on "apology to a wife betrayed"

A former member wrote: this sort of writing has a tendency to lash out souls, it either makes them think about how they've been wronged, or how they've wronged others. there is a lot of quality in a poem which can unleash such a human reaction like that
On Saturday, November 17, 2012, Corinthian (306) wrote:

I have been reading alot of your works,today you are new and I have been away for awhile ... From what I have read you seem to be very confused about things , and the word betrayal for your wife ... I don't even feel that is a deserving word .. And I think she could in no way possible be able to trust you again . Is unfair for what you did to her . Many blessings to her .. And hope you can find some cure for your loneliness
On Saturday, November 17, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

not sure what you mean? i definitely betrayed her trust i am baffled why she wants to stay with me
On Saturday, November 17, 2012, Corinthian (306) wrote:

I have not a clue why anyone would *beg* an unfaithful man ...it is very foolish of her as this behavior most likely will repeat ..... Good evening .
On Monday, November 26, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

her staying does neither of us any good. does she really see texting and sexting as less of a betrayal than being within driving distance of the other?
On Monday, November 26, 2012, Corinthian (306) wrote:

You have a serious problem do you understand that ? Is almost as if you are proud of what you do .. If you were ....( were ) a good man . You would leave her , you dont deserve her .
On Tuesday, November 27, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

you are the only one talking about what really matters, *her*, thank you for that.
On Monday, November 26, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

i am not proud the shame is shattering me i cannot leave unless she lets me go
On Monday, November 5, 2012, archangelmichael (10) wrote:

Thank you for sharing. Some day I hope to hear something like this from the woman I lost but still love, yet I know it will never happen. I know that when these things happen both people are hurt beyond comprehension.
On Saturday, November 17, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

its just so much total chaos... starting to feel like home
On Thursday, November 1, 2012, dwells (4177) wrote:

Intensely personal, thanks for sharing, and 30% of all relationships break up due to internet / online relationships. As Jimmie Carter used to say " to sin in the heart is still a sin" but as I say - all part of being a man too, cheers and best of luck with your lady.
On Thursday, November 1, 2012, BetaWolfinVA (791) wrote:

it was all over but the screaming long before i started to stray ... Fighting this realization has be crashing into therapy again. had i been happy, i would have never been distracted by Raven... nor would i have fallen in love with WolfsBane.