It Should Have Been Better
By cre
She rarely spoke of her start in life Or the years she'd worked to overcome strife And all anyone saw was the smile in her eyes Too smug and self-righteous to ever realize Her tenderness, fragile, like a dream on the wind Made her easy to crush when she needed a friend When the love of her life loved someone else And spun her joy into a version of hell She sought out her comfort in the hugs of others But it was clear from their words they felt so far above her:
it could be worse - don't cry do not weep you have no right here you sit so sad and sighing while half the world is dead or dying they shamed her heart with verse upon verse of "just remember - it could always be worse"
--------
She moved on and found new smiles Worked at making life worthwhile But soon enough the hard times hit The kids were hungry in clothes unfit She toiled from dawn till late at night Though sad and worn she did not cry Until one day in weariness She wept to friends of her distress But once again they could not see Past their own big heads to their friend in need
it could be worse - don't cry do not weep you have no right here you sit so sad and sighing while half the world is dead or dying they tore her heart with verse upon verse of "just remember - it could always be worse"
--------
Then
one day on a warm spring morning
She fell to sickness with little warning
The doctor confirmed her silent fears
And told her she'd reached the dusk of her years
Her heart was sad and she ached for friends
For someone who'd hold her and help face the end
But alone she drew her final breath
And her "friends" were surprised when they heard of her death
By way of GoodBye she left a few simple words
And prayed they'd be heeded and not go unheard:
You
always told me not to cry
That as for weeping I had no right
When I was sad and fell to sighing
You said just think, you could be dying
You broke my heart with your careless verse
Don't you know I knew it could have been worse?
I only wanted warmth and love
But no matter my need it was never enough
My last dying hope is that somehow you'll see
How hurtful and careless your actions can be
And maybe the next time a "friend" needs some care
You will be kinder, and you will be there
So farewell, remember, the point of this letter:
It could have been worse, but it should have been better.
Awards
Comments on "It Should Have Been Better"
-
A former member wrote:
Oh my god...i really don't know what to say hun,this is jus so,so beautiful.I felt like crying after i read this...its so touching.Im just sorry that i cant think of a better comment to leave.Dusky..xxx...
-
On Sunday, October 5, 2003, Drifter
(265) wrote:
I love this one no matter how many times i read it. Smacks you with truth and leaves you stunned.
-
On Saturday, October 4, 2003, Mademoiselle_Minx
(108) wrote:
wow...this is soo true...def a fave...dont know what to say because its so perfect...~katie~
-
On Saturday, September 27, 2003, yslehc
(334) wrote:
wow that was amazing.. dont know what else to say... its awsome
-
On Saturday, September 20, 2003, TheMistressBucket
(18) wrote:
*With tears in my eyes* How beautiful, thoughtful, and completly touching this piece is. What an amazing Poet you are!
-
On Saturday, September 20, 2003, Blinded_Tiger
(518) wrote:
In fear we barely touch skin, Skin shall desire a pure touch, It will never fail to notice, Pure or shallow touch, And as it grows cold, Some shall find a final relief. Tiger
-
On Friday, August 29, 2003, Drea
(1388) wrote:
it touched me deeply. so many times i have heard "it could always be worse". very beautiful. ~Drea~
-
On Sunday, August 17, 2003, _Andrew_
(245) wrote:
LoL i loved the ending fo sho, the entire poem was tear jerking, but in the end i could only smile, awesome picture, and just... BEAUTIFUL *~*aNDReW*~*
-
A former member wrote:
I don't know what to say that everyone else hasn't said already. VERY great write and message. This has 'Ancient Proverb' written all over it. ~Urban Shipwreck~
-
A former member wrote:
This is absolutely beautiful, cre... it's going in my favourites, it rings so true and it's beautifully written.
-
A former member wrote:
Truely touching and beautifully written ..but what's even more sad is that toooo many people are shitheads like that.
-
On Saturday, August 9, 2003, IceDragoness
(193) wrote:
definately something that should be read and well remembered, such an incredibly sad story with a good lesson, at the end i was wondering to myself what happened to the kids though ~Dawn
-
A former member wrote:
I really like this poem it made me think
-
A former member wrote:
that is such an awesome peom my god.wow WOW
-
A former member wrote:
WOW That was really good...It reminds me of a poem one of the people I know wrote. Although she didn't die
-
A former member wrote:
WOW....i couldnt breathe after i read this honestly, your poems make my eyes get stuck to the screen, i feel as if it is happening right before me, you truely are amazing...*stares at the screen in awe*
-
On Wednesday, July 16, 2003, Sky Singer
(153) wrote:
i wish i had something to say that isn't already here. brilliant poem, and i think i, too, will be more careful when i use that phrase.
-
On Tuesday, July 15, 2003, Rebel_Angel
(321) wrote:
wow this is good...I will try never to use that phrase again...till I forget...lol Great Write
-
A former member wrote:
Cre, this is so beautiful and so true!!! Amazing piece.. :)
-
On Sunday, July 13, 2003, hate_doll
(263) wrote:
Cre...this is absolutely beautiful...so sad and treacherous. Such a tender message. You're work is treasured by me...especially this piece...simply amazing...
-
A former member wrote:
There's tears in my eyes right now, and no, I'm not exaggerating that...this is brilliant and so...oh, I'm at a loss, dear..
-
On Saturday, July 12, 2003, Demosthenes
(155) wrote:
o god cre. you have no idea how much i wish i had the words to explain how much i love this. its completely perfect. i cant usually find at least two or three flaaws in everything i read, because im a perfectionist... but i found non ein this. -B
-
On Friday, July 11, 2003, Jonas
(715) wrote:
with each piece i read you break my heart... you may have noticed i don't frequent your site so much as i did... because, i swear you touch so deeply and chip away pieces of my heart... and i'm afraid that i will have none left at the end of my reading
-
On Friday, July 11, 2003, Jonas
(715) wrote:
it doesn't so much sound like it, but that is utterly complimentary, if your work is sad, it is perfectly sad, a sadness that pierces and penetrates to the very core of a sensitive young man... you show me blue hued beauty
-
A former member wrote:
This piece is so... true. So sad but true. And i have felt this woman's pain indeed. I love this. Keep it up hun. #flower#
-
On Thursday, July 10, 2003, Ravenblade
(307) wrote:
Absolutely amazing work cre...I can't believe I've been away so long as to not have read up on your newest work, but when I get more time I shall do my best...this is sad but powerful. great rhythm, beautiful flow, unbelievably worded. Definatly a favor
-
On Thursday, July 10, 2003, Ravenblade
(307) wrote:
favorite*
-
A former member wrote:
oh my god. how you come up with these insanely brilliant ideas for poetry, and then masterfully put them into the pages of literature with pure emotion and heart, is way past me... you rule. :)
-
A former member wrote:
YES!!! EXACTLY!!!! ugh! i sooo know this feeling cre and wow you just said it so perfectly. Awesome write lady!
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, GothicBlack
(186) wrote:
hmm.. i'm at a loss of words.. not sure what to say to this.. besides maybe thank you. i'll watch my words with friends and others.. hmmm.. i really enjoyed this, it opened my eyes. thanks. ~gothic~
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, Ophelia
(221) wrote:
I have sat here trying to write a comment and I just don't know what to say except this is great..........O
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, Aurora_Light
(472) wrote:
wow i think i will never use those words again. i love this write and hope that people realize "It could have been worse, but it should have been better." (to quote a great poet)
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, anathema
(50) wrote:
exactly right. and cursed are the people who don't remember that. brava, dear...
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, Six-Out
(1423) wrote:
Very good point Jane, very good, I know, I've used the whole coulda been worse scenario, and this makes me look at it differently. Great.
-
On Wednesday, July 9, 2003, maddin foxxxy
(358) wrote:
::tears::...this is wonderfully written as it left a tender thought aswell...you write the truth and i can really swim through that perspective..AMAZING.