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Neglected Flowers
By Scarrzz
What is the point of this struggle?
Why try to breathe ?
My
lungs feel full of cobwebs and dried blood,
And the air is poisoned
by the smoke of burning dreams.
My entrails trail behind me
Disemboweled by the thorny barbs of your promises
And your
neglect.
Yet still I crawl forward,
More from will
than from strength,
Dragging all that is left of me
Through
the briars and the ashes and the memories.
I wanted to build
you a garden,
And in it plant my seed.
But I was murdered by
the Rose bed
And slowly descended into the ground.
Perhaps
the flowers here will one day grow beautiful
But you will not care
Because I gave them to you.
.
Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited.
Ask the author first.
© 2008 Scarrzz
Comments on "Neglected Flowers"
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A former member wrote:
Scarrzz the opening describes my daily struggles to a "T". "Yet I still crawl forwar," is exactly what I do day by day. I vowed not to let my PTSD control my life. It is an extreme battle. Thank you for your thoughts.
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On Tuesday, October 11, 2011, Dei
(663)
wrote:
wow. those were really intense visuals. and i love the garden metaphores. kudos
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On Friday, October 24, 2008, Leith Plunkett
(237) wrote:
I really enjoyed this. The line(And the air is poisoned by the smoke of burning dreams)so sorrowfull. I felt it really set the rest of the poem. great write
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A former member wrote:
very sad... and the weight of this descends upon the reader, not as an anvil, but as a piano stripped of its teeth and laden with a thousand souls that cling to its last notes... I must say that I felt the imagery was beneath your ability, though expressed with power and sincerity. The last line seems to indict the reader as complacent... the guilty bystander.
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On Tuesday, October 28, 2008, Scarrzz
(235) wrote:
You are very perceptive, Ainsof. The difference in this work is that I wrote it not in the throes of emotional devaststion, but in a state of numbness. These are my thoughts without my heart. - But there are also deeper meanings that only the one I wrote it to would understand.
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A former member wrote:
*stunned* this was much to much to bear and you bare bones jones it all the way through, perfectly
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On Tuesday, October 21, 2008, Narcissa
(391) wrote:
"Disemboweled by the thorny barbs of your promises"...Ouch...good piece though it saddens me...especially the last stanza.
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