Pre-Winter Discontent
By purr_verse
Autumn does not suit me.
Not the way it suits nature -
Dramatic, ephemeral and ablaze with
Infinity;
For nature brings fireworks to its descent,
Enchantments and magics burning with
A cacophony of glories,
Rich with the bounty of change.
Time does not treat me as kindly, and
Here in the mirror, my fading
Eyes reflect another line beneath the blue.
Omnivorous, passionate season,
No, I don't wear your postcard delights.
Conceit and frayed vanities
Or evermore shallowness
Mire me in wishing for spring to return
Immersed in its freshness and youth, so
Nubile and passionate...
Goddamn this encroaching of age.
Colour my clock with that vermilion splendour
Offered to the trees in their blazingwild throes
Let me revel in such majesty ... ah, but autumn
Does not suit me; I merely fall.
***
Comments on "Pre-Winter Discontent"
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On Saturday, January 14, 2006, stormtalk
(727) wrote:
"blazingwild" is a blazingwild word. the beautifully tortured despondence of this work leaves me simultaneously horrified and curious at the prospects of the future, like a human sacrifice promised eternal life.
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A former member wrote:
this is resplendent, ataxic. like time is a machine and you try to stop it and your hand gets eaten. "the century grinds on." this is so alluringly annihilative.
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A former member wrote:
Add my voice to the choir of praise.
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On Tuesday, September 27, 2005, BoldSolitude
(214) wrote:
Great acrostic, "And I fear the oncoming cold" perfect phrase for it. Would fit right in line as the last line as well.
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On Tuesday, September 27, 2005, BoldSolitude
(214) wrote:
I never thought of nature aging before compared to our aging, but as you implied or I percieved, trees grow more majestic and we become decrepit. Nature refreshes itself and we tend to become more tainted.
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On Sunday, September 25, 2005, flying_fox
(571) wrote:
Brilliant words from a brilliand - and beautiful - mind. The end pun floored me. Time and the inevitable changing of seasons will never diminish your exceptional beauty, my sister.
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On Sunday, September 25, 2005, flying_fox
(571) wrote:
I also particularly liked 'colour my clock'. Am sitting here shaking my head in wonder at your cleverisity. :) That's my special word for you.
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A former member wrote:
there's a deep melancholy in your voice that whispers longing unquenchable. your diction is delightful but not overstated. your words reached into me and found a home, i trust they will keep me warm in winters grasp, thankyou.
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On Thursday, September 15, 2005, Solace
(1065) wrote:
What muse whispered into your ears the inspiration for this marvelous/delicious suffusion of beautiful melancholia...So tangible and ephemeral...Brilliant!
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A former member wrote:
"And I fear the oncoming cold" Brilliant! An ephemeral stretch of time's descent you have enchanted here in the nature of autumn's persona. (Echoes of Persephone's myth). Lucent visual beauty.
"Here in the mirror, my fading..." the reflection of our 'fra
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A former member wrote:
...'frayed vanities'. "ah, but autumn
Does not suit me; I merely fall." A perfect coda to tie in the opening line; has the absolute feel of a classic poem inventively accomplished, portrayed, & structured. Very well done: Bravo!
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A former member wrote:
...and the final word: 'fall', a perfect & well-thought placement as mirrors the prelude to winter's anguish, yearning, disquiet. Like a softly felled leaf...morphs into a solitary snowflake...fades...
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A former member wrote:
Beautifully written. A joy to read.
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A former member wrote:
I do believe that you will win.
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On Sunday, September 11, 2005, Gideon Lost
(137) wrote:
This is a great piece. I simply love the sound of the language. I actually find myself sounding out the words so eloquently put. Plus the extra little pun in the end was a slam dunk. Great write! -Gideon
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On Saturday, September 10, 2005, girlafraid
(479) wrote:
i love this, especially the last stanza, particularly because you used the word "throes", which gave it a little extra kick...splendid!
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On Saturday, September 10, 2005, redtearswhitesnow
(79) wrote:
This is lovely indeed
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On Saturday, September 10, 2005, Northstar
(374) wrote:
wow this is lovely --the ending is perfect!
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On Saturday, September 10, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
i like it very much.....it has a kinda 'said' wisdom to it.....autumn is the brunch between winter and summer:*)