Almost Forever
By cre
For a moment
It was long, so long
I was sure I heard the air around me crackling
In indignant defiance to this moment,
a minute,
a second,
Which refused to stay within accepted boundaries
And stretched on
Until somewhere around
Forever
Much too
l o n g
For a moment
Then this moment
With an air of abruptness
Paralleled
only
by
a car speeding along Interstate 95 at 95 miles
per hour
(That's 1.583 repeating miles per minute)
Anyway
Speeding along at 95 mph
and
SLAM!
Smashing into the pilings of a certain bridge
Indeed, stopping so suddenly that the passenger felt
Somewhat inclined to continue along his way
Without the car
So
It was in this precipitous nature
That this much too long
M o m e n t
Ended
And left me breathless
And cold
In a void where everything meaningful
Began to rain down around my head
Like half-melted icicles
Crashing down from the gutters of a wintering house
And I knew.
Like the icicles
And the passenger
You were gone.
And I wished
That the moment that seemed so long
At first
And now seemed so much too brief
Had lived for more than
Almost forever.
Comments on "Almost Forever"
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A former member wrote:
It's like watching it on film in slow motion, words capturing the picture so perfectly and showing the expressions cross the face as if they were seen in a mirror....
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On Tuesday, April 29, 2003, hate_doll
(263) wrote:
absoloutly amazing! I don't even have words to descibe this beautifully touching write...i have fallen for you work...
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On Monday, April 21, 2003, TropicalSnowstorm
(1580) wrote:
This is my favourite piece by you so far! Love the mood you set with your parallel and manner of description - fantastic! Ciao, T/S
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On Monday, April 21, 2003, Jonas
(715) wrote:
tear jerking and amazingly well written. left me breathless and yearning for my handful of endless moments... though i still find myself splattered on the shoulder...
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On Monday, April 21, 2003, liquid_emotion
(323) wrote:
geez. You pick out a new style and practically conquer it in a first try. Stunning show of growth.
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On Sunday, April 20, 2003, Armand
(54) wrote:
memento mori... "Like half-melted icicles...from the gutters of a wintering house...You were gone." - an absolutely fabulous image and simile! wonderful capture of slow motion tragedy.
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On Sunday, April 20, 2003, Stranger
(263) wrote:
This poem is an achievement. Very good work. You would have to be a monster not be moved by it.
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A former member wrote:
i cannot even describe how ridiculously tight this poem is. what the.... how the...... wow. :)
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A former member wrote:
wow. affects me in a way most writings never attempt to. beautiful.
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On Tuesday, April 15, 2003, KittyStryker
(710) wrote:
I like the way you arranged this differently... it slams into my thoughts and shakes me up. Lovely, as always.
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On Tuesday, April 15, 2003, Six-Out
(1423) wrote:
Jane. Jane....Wow.
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A former member wrote:
nice
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On Tuesday, April 15, 2003, shadowsinthelight
(146) wrote:
yup, what they say
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A former member wrote:
this is amazing, cre. great job!!
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On Monday, April 14, 2003, Rachel
(210) wrote:
Poetry, like art, relates to each person differently. That's the beauty of it. See, I know this didn't mean the same to you as it does to me, nor as it will to the next person to read it. But either way, it's still beautiful.