SCIENCE NEWS... why men like boobs
By TheBardOfBlasphemy
We've known about it since time began... even before the hair started falling
off of them about five million years ago. Men like boobs. Boys like tits.
Fags like buttsex. More on that later.
Now scientists have discovered genetic data to back up the man-boob theory.
It's called the Y-chromosome and the implications are that whoever has
one really badly wants to grope, stroke, squeeze and fondle those sweet
succulent boobies until the sticky white stuff squirts into my underpants
and makes me want to start doing my own laundry for no reason in particular,
thanks mum.
The scientists' "thorns in the (back)side" of this theory are the afore-mentioned
butt-jabbing boys who have Y-chromosomes but seem to deny their inherent
boob-cravings.
Scientists have postulated that this conundrum is due to external environmental
factors such as:
1. Being dropped on their heads as babies
2. Being forced to play with Barbie dolls (tm)
3. Not watching Rambo (tm) as a kid, and instead watching faggy crap like
Mary Poppins (tm)
4. Being fed lies like "Hey, girls have rights too, you know..."
Needless to say, we scientists here at Blasphemedia will continue our arduous
and time consuming research* into this matter.
* - Research may or may not involve staring
at copious amounts of porn.
Comments on "SCIENCE NEWS... why men like boobs"
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A former member wrote:
hahahahaha so funny!
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On Friday, April 17, 2009, Shortnlethal
(65) wrote:
lol funny thing..it's true!
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On Monday, October 29, 2007, Mari
(419) wrote:
funny.
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On Tuesday, January 2, 2007, WinterGrave
(258) wrote:
lol, i spell good
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On Tuesday, January 2, 2007, WinterGrave
(258) wrote:
wow, that was funny. reading everyone eslses comments was funny to.lol.~~~Grave
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On Thursday, June 8, 2006, Dei
(663) wrote:
wow.... time in my life i can never get back...
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On Friday, October 14, 2005, shadowsinthelight
(146) wrote:
"Why did God give women boobs?"....."It gives men something to look at while women are talking." Peter Griffen
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On Friday, October 14, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
The Socrates of Stewie Lane..........truly the Phat Bastard of Philosophy;) heh heh heh heh heh heh
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On Friday, October 14, 2005, shadowsinthelight
(146) wrote:
"I must be an ass-man, because all my friends keep telling me, 'You are an ass, man.'" Rodney Dangerfield
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On Friday, October 14, 2005, Nail Bunny
(161) wrote:
that's fucking hilarious, amazing. Ps.-if you need help with the "reserch"...
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On Monday, October 3, 2005, AHHH
(184) wrote:
1, 2, 3, 4, what awful awful things these are. i feel bad for those who these have happened to.
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, Mahakala
(207) wrote:
hahaha funny....had a good laugh and enjoyed it very much....
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
This page is not an open forum to debate the topic of groups being degraded by me. Any more pointless comments will be deleted.
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
lol.....i'm roll'n AND my side hurts.......i love a good 'Fuck it' way to be;)
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, ApathysKiss
(377) wrote:
lmao
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
Homosexuals may or may not find this offensive. If they do... tough. There's a lot of stuff being posted that certain people might find offensive. No-one's forcing anyone to read anything.
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On Friday, August 26, 2005, Liz
(265) wrote:
I really dislike the fact that you have to bash homosexuals in order to prove the your point that women's bodies are objects. Can't you stick to degrading just one group?
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
'Fags like buttsex'....he's right, which is why gay guys bash women ALL the time...women are their competition so they act like two-faced assholes when they get jealous by picking at womens self esteem.
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On Friday, August 26, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
actually, i would contend that the only group i have degraded by writing this article is myself. Screw the fags... other boys do.
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, stormtalk
(727) wrote:
gays and women are basically the same thing, so he actually did stick to one group... hmmm bard, does that make you gay?
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, stormtalk
(727) wrote:
p.s. anyone who takes me seriously has downe syndrome
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
lol...down syndrome....but women and gays are not 'alike'.....women ARE women...gays are just doing a VERY bad imitation of a women on PMS flapping around like a fish out of water......it's insulting...they have women envy:)
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On Tuesday, August 23, 2005, Grim_Sorrow
(74) wrote:
lol... whatever man... I fail to understand this interest in a womans mamory's
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On Friday, August 19, 2005, l mo
(55) wrote:
And this is the conclusion I have come to -- All men are perverted perverts.
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On Friday, August 19, 2005, l mo
(55) wrote:
wow, i just noticed how dumb that sounds "perverted perverts". lets just say you can take your pick out of the two....
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, stormtalk
(727) wrote:
'perverted' is one of those words like 'unnatural' that actually means pretty much nothing
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On Saturday, August 20, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
haha... and just look at how many LOVED reading this... i rest my case (and somehow prove yours simultaneously)
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On Friday, August 19, 2005, Lotophagi
(333) wrote:
*realisation dawns* lol, good luck with further research, I wish you fruitful results and neverending questions to ensure a long future in this field of questioning.
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, SilentStalker
(1047) wrote:
...after many years of walking the streets and searching the internet, I've come to the conclusion that I'm not a breast-man...my eyes tend to focus on the waist level...
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, SilentStalker
(1047) wrote:
...not that I wouldn't stare if they happened to be showing; I just wouldn't stare as long as most other guys would...
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, stormtalk
(727) wrote:
homo
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
lol
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On Saturday, August 27, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
lol
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, ONEANDLONELY
(114) wrote:
Lest we not forget: legs, ass, _ussy.
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A former member wrote:
meh..boobs is for babies...further proof men are big babies...
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On Monday, August 22, 2005, NikesRain
(1240) wrote:
lmao excellent assessment
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A former member wrote:
whats boobs?
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On Monday, August 8, 2005, elisa
(1595) wrote:
a sweet rack is the gift that keeps on given.....*looks down at sweet rack*.........yup;) ~oo~
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On Monday, August 8, 2005, Drea
(1388) wrote:
I'm a chick and I love boobs. mmmmmboobs
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On Thursday, August 11, 2005, Malice In Wonderland
(976) wrote:
hell yes.
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A former member wrote:
...mary poppins was a drug-culture subliminal messaging hype, and it was the shit in its own right.... rambo fucking sucked, bro.... keep it original with the old school war stories.... but with all this said, i love tits like a fat kid loves oreo cookies
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A former member wrote:
hooray for boobies?
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On Monday, August 8, 2005, ApathysKiss
(377) wrote:
hahahahahahahaha, bard, is this really true? which new scientist issue was this from hahahaha. Being fed lies like "Hey, girls have rights too, you know..." i wonder who came up with that. nobel prize for you, bard. haha ~michelle~