My brain is swollen with hormones
pounded unmercifully on the boundaries of my skull
The world has become slanted and then rights it's self
This theater teeter tottering world is becoming more than I can bear
My stomach heaves
and I fight to keep what is in there from fighting it's way out
My eyes are raining and my face is flush
A fever races through my blood
going from white heat to ice water in my veins
My thoughts race by in still shot frames
and I want to scream but I might vomit instead
It only feels good when I cry
it's like taking a razor to my veins
the sweet relief
when the tears come pouring out of the veins of my souls plight
My body has become an independent vessel from my intentions
it does things that I don't understand nor can possibly control
And I don't know if I should want to feel better
I am secure in this confusion
I deserve it
it is the penitence that I must endure
penalty for happiness