Boys, and bad behavior
By Lab Rat
Suddenly, I discovered truth
Fragile and suffering
Beneath the overgrown weeds
And slanted boards
Of a back porch
I remembered years before
With the sunlight in my eyes
I had just found scrapped knees
A bloody lip
Tenderly I witnessed the horror
Of violent men
And the disregard
Of bested women
I heard words I could never speak
Comprehending languages
That don't exist
Not dead nor buried
But make believe
And I asked that little girl
"Remember me"
As we slid beneath slanted boards
That made up a poor porch
She smiled at me, reaching for my hand
With her small delicate one
She promised me
She would remember
And I believe she did
Though I've not seen her
Not since, and rarely before
Though at times I like to think
That she thinks of me
Remembering the little boy
With the bad temper
Suddenly, I had found truth
In those memories
Seeing the moment
When my nose started to bleed
Tasting the blood there
On split lip, and the pain
From cut up knees
The porch was still slanted
Like the sunbeams cascading
Through all those trees
The smell of wild flowers, still lingers
And I could see that little girl
In the sundress and sandals
Hiding beneath that broken porch
With the boy with the bad temper
Hiding beneath that sundered foyer
From violent men, with bad intentions
Listening to the wheeping
Of women, broken by the same behavior
Suddenly I realized, I remembered
Just a dream, it would seem
Back before we were teens
Where broken porches were shelter
Back when I had a bad temper
Comments on "Boys, and bad behavior"
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On Friday, February 15, 2019, Jonas Robinson
(848) wrote:
A nice use of imagery to convey the strains of growth and humanity. :)
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On Tuesday, January 26, 2016, TropicalSnowstorm
(1580) wrote:
Holy crap, this was awesome! I like the repeated refrain of the boy with the bad temper...I like the memory of seeking shelter, both in and with innocence...I especially like the implied fork in the road where you seek to not join in this "legacy" of behavior. The way it was written, with the stops and starts, mirrored the flashes of memories. This is a real masterpiece! Ciao, T/S
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On Tuesday, January 26, 2016, Lab Rat
(124) wrote:
thanks for the feedback and the insight, I appreciate it. I'm also glad you enjoyed it.
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On Monday, January 18, 2016, Drea
(1388) wrote:
This reminded me of different times in my life. I've been that little girl and I've been that boy. This kind of forced me to remember. Smells... Tastes... Feelings... Parts of me (kind of) hate you for making me remember. However, another part is deeply grateful for the reminder. Damn you.
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On Thursday, January 14, 2016, Electric-Chair
(121) wrote:
Story telling at its best, Thanks
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On Thursday, January 14, 2016, freudian-slip
(236) wrote:
like a reading a story without the struggle of reading a story if that makes sense. flowing
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On Wednesday, January 6, 2016, Malice In Wonderland
(976) wrote:
I needed this. Thanks
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A former member wrote:
You start the reader with an open bleeding wound, scare over and rip it open again. Well done, thank you.
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On Sunday, January 3, 2016, soul_versing
(774) wrote:
I rather enjoyed, the outside looking in approach that you have displayed here. Sometimes it's better to take a look back to remind us of all the things that have strengthened us. Powerful piece, you know how to make a lasting impression. I say, hello there poet and welcome to the valley. -Write on
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On Sunday, January 3, 2016, Lab Rat
(124) wrote:
I'm happy you enjoyed it! And thank you for the insight as to why, I appreciate the praise.