Under Crimson Eyes
By RubyXero
"Did it hurt?"
...
"Don't say it" she warns.
(here it comes)
..."when you fell from heaven?"
The highest
rate per hour
couldn't conceal the knife pierced
disdain from
her eyes.
A slight tilt
and expansion of her pupils
divesting
her facade,
as irises tint crimson.
whispers "Heaven
is not where I reign..."
Laughing. he strolls away.
*enticing little man...
So oblivious...*
Line after
line,
he blurts as he passes.
Each attempt met with
a
cool smile.
At 11th strike
she leaves to her car...
paying no mind to
the eyes baring into her back...
.
.
.
.
.
A thrice, knock
knocking
at his door.
Sluggish in drowsy partial-sleep
he creaks it
open.
Blasted by
glacial winds...
instantly freezing
every pore,
bone and vein
throughout his entire being.
No person to claim the knock.
No body in this hallway.
Seconds passing,
as he attempts to
regain control.
To just. move!
Finally turning back into
his hotel
room.
3:00am the clock reminds.
Laying down in bed;
shaking
the events.
Curling into the blankets
to thaw his iced body.
Staring into the darkness,
and suddenly bright,
glowing
scarlet eyes bare
into his.
Startled! trying to move...
Paralysis has consumed him.
Helpless. Completely.
She lightens the room
a bit.
Basking in treats to come.
As she unrobes,
keeping his attention...
Perfect
in form.
demonic in nature
A creature of mystery
with
sinister yearnings.
Wearing only her skin now,
straddling
this aroused,
yet terrified human.
Slowly she leans down.
Closing in...
to his ear.
With 5 voices
and
a hissing undertone,
again she whispers...
...
"On this night.
dark as the dead. with
only muffled air and
solid walls
to mock. your pleas.
I have but one request.
...scream."
Awards
Comments on "Under Crimson Eyes"
-
On Monday, August 26, 2019, Elizabeth kaczocha
(20) wrote:
Great story line. I really got into it.great job!
-
On Monday, April 30, 2012, Dominic
(53) wrote:
Sexy in a non cliched intensely sensual way. Somewhere between sex and death?
-
On Monday, April 9, 2012, Squishy
(32) wrote:
this is realy good it flows very well and it just expresses so well lovely :) thanks
-
A former member wrote:
This was lovely. Nice work Ruby. It flows nicely and sounds right in my head.
-
On Monday, August 11, 2008, Kaleidoscope_Heart
(111) wrote:
I think I am going crazy cause I could have sworn I posted a comment. Anyway, abolutely intoxicating and seductive.
-
On Monday, August 11, 2008, Kaleidoscope_Heart
(111) wrote:
AND, the language you use sucks the reader right in. I felt like the images were dancing in front of me. Indeed a woman to die for ;)
-
On Monday, June 9, 2008, Withering petals
(65) wrote:
kept me clinging on to each coming word, beautiful crimson fluency and a pleasantly sharp ending. Wonderful work (and thank you for the welcome to DP!) It's a pleasure to be able to read your work ~Downstream~
-
A former member wrote:
omg. that was awesome. ^_^ kudos on the writing. thnx fer the comments.
-
A former member wrote:
Incredible write....erotic....animalistic yet humane.
-
On Tuesday, May 27, 2008, MESUN
(230) wrote:
Yes, yes, yes, yes, fucking yes! Now that just pulled me along and WHAM! That last stanza and final verse, damn, amazing. I felt the cold and I felt the comfort of being back bed, and then the fear and excitement. Awesome.
-
On Thursday, May 22, 2008, Sketso
(416) wrote:
I just wonder, would it have been his "pleas" or his "please". HA! Amusing and chilling all at once.
-
On Thursday, May 22, 2008, Taunting The Reaper
(169) wrote:
Kinky...LOL, me likes :) I love the way the tension builds up and the way you delivered the last part. Ice cold yet blazing hot.
-
A former member wrote:
Strap me in baby, i'm up for some demonic sex, I think the 'exorcist scene' said it best "fuck me...fuck me"...and i'll scream... if you do too. - hmmm feel like some pop corn now...enjoyed;)
-
On Thursday, May 22, 2008, Fantecstasy
(120) wrote:
In-*expletive*-credible. I haven't read something that has appealed this much to me on here in a while. *Tips hat twice*