I find myself
In wry amusement
Choking back the tears
I consider all the fears
I've catered to for life
It's a funny end.

These are the days
In which
Seconds whisper finality
To the inside of my head
And I realize an overwhelming desire
To wake up dead.

Yet my living hours were spent
In fear of retribution
The threats that I perceived
Were subject to no dilution
I quaked, and cried
And prayed to die
It took me far too long to see
The evil that I feared had no power over me.

Now there's irony
For all I seek is peace
I want to drop this no-good lease
But the fear instilled
Is a fear of what awaits
In bitter tones my laugh escapes.

And in the end, I find I cannot flee;
They have won, through fear
For it's fear that has imprisoned me.