Some Sort of Lovely (revised)
By Dei
Look.
Look. This type of beauty is rare. This unique and complete collapse.
Feel free to stare blindly while I hide under the twisted brambles
Of your obscene lies like plush, familiar blankets.
Speak.
Speak. Whispers to soothe my soul and soften the twitch
In my jaw. Perhaps I wont break my teeth today.
Chewing the fat and sipping your sweet prose.
Listen.
Listen and feel free to wonder which sound was more deafening.
The slam of the door, or the cracking in my chest. Such a lovely duet.
I suppose I would have said "Heart", but I can still feel it beating
Inside your pocket next to the lint and cigarette butts.
(drip)
Useless tears tend to burn the most.
(drip)
Melting away the soul.
(drip)
This brimstone burns cold.
(drip)
Can you smell the salted waves chasing you?
Can you feel the burning torrent dragging the sand from under your toes
And crunching painfully as it turns to glass?
(drip)
We love this storm.
I am.
I am elegance. Breathtaking in my own disastrous, tragic way.
If fear is what makes us brave, then colour me cowardly.
(drip)
We love this.
(drip)
(drip)
(Splash)
Watch the phoenix turn to ash.
Author's Note:
This revision was a long time coming.Comments on "Some Sort of Lovely (revised)"
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A former member wrote:
this is amazing, really should be proud of it. fun read thanks
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On Monday, February 25, 2013, Ravenblade
(307) wrote:
I love that your poetry feels like it should be read slow, and emphasized in certain points that you seem to break off so as to draw attention to them. Some very nice lines that were pleasant to see and screamed in my mind as beautiful as literature may ever be...thank you for sharing.
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On Thursday, February 21, 2013, BetaWolfinVA
(791) wrote:
I really do love your imagry in this :)
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On Saturday, January 5, 2013, NikesRain
(1240) wrote:
heartbreaking and gorgeous at the same time... it dances like spinning maple seeds... elegant and aching... stunning... simply stunning piece
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On Thursday, November 8, 2012, Oliver Twisted
(53) wrote:
(^_ï¼ï¼‰ï½„
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On Monday, October 10, 2011, Devilish
(2633) wrote:
Hell yeah!! This is hot as fuck.. Such skill ya have here.. Kinda made me wana taste it...
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On Sunday, April 4, 2010, Meadowhawk
(160) wrote:
Well written! Great flow, beautifully worded.
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On Sunday, February 3, 2008, Taunting The Reaper
(169) wrote:
I read this and I wouldn't say that I didn't flinch because you reached in deep and I felt... and it was good so I'm thanking you now though I don't have the words to tell you how your poem was magic and magic is special.
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On Tuesday, April 17, 2007, Bella Butchery
(696) wrote:
i dont know why i never came across you before.... ill come back when i have something more constructive to say... for now lets just say i really dig the lingo
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On Tuesday, February 20, 2007, Aunty Depressant
(423) wrote:
Hey sweet lady, so sad and beautiful, so human. Odd, I just ended up watching the animation a few hours ago, and for some reason it bothers me that she is awakened.
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On Wednesday, May 24, 2006, DoctorAsh
(371) wrote:
Paper lady, I thought this write was absolutely beautiful. Sometimes I wish I could reach into writes like this and alter the emotions of the author by somehow wishing that I could have been there to prevent them. But at the same time these particular ...
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On Wednesday, May 24, 2006, DoctorAsh
(371) wrote:
emotions unfold into a reminder that too many of us go without a single notice sometimes, a single notice that could make a world of difference, but is simply bypassed by a world that remains isolated by inopportune devices. Much love. Daniel
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A former member wrote:
*speech less* i wish i knew what to say. but i know that that was amazing
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A former member wrote:
You put it in such words that I couldn't say better myself. Excellent job! ~Lauryn
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On Wednesday, March 16, 2005, TropicalSnowstorm
(1580) wrote:
I especially liked the lines "A beauty so rare Barely noticed Hardly seen. Hidden beneath the dark the twisted..." Very nice description! Ciao, T/S
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On Sunday, January 2, 2005, stumbleine queen
(2) wrote:
i like your style of writing, short impactful lines that flow so nicely. very nice poem... beautifully morbid.
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A former member wrote:
beautiful write
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On Sunday, December 26, 2004, AniDayz
(812) wrote:
might i add...'lovely'...; ]
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On Sunday, December 26, 2004, AniDayz
(812) wrote:
i love the title, thru the poem, i can sense such saddness, a deep loss almost...like the poem is recited by a narrator who feels this pain they are witnessing,yet it is so descriptive, you can feel the pain from 'her' almost firsthand...nice
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On Saturday, December 25, 2004, Dei
(663) wrote:
thank you! i like your writes too
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On Saturday, December 25, 2004, Full blame
(28) wrote:
your pieces read so well, so easily. captivating flow. enjoyed "Sacrifice" too