perforated hell

I don’t want to make you feel guilty

There’s no daily price I’d have you pay.

Goddamn it- if I could,

I’d make it all go away.

I feel so out of control

My head and heart are spinning.

I feel silly

because I’ve been busting my ass

to convince you of my love

since the very beginning.

And in my consuming efforts

I never took the time to consider

the chance I was taking by

handing my heart over whole

-I never really thought of it breaking-

But I felt it.

And in my cell, - my perforated hell..?-

I often found myself sobbing and shaking

optimism faking.

I suppose it’s the inevitable, though.

Nothing stays perfect forever…

every heart comes to bear scars

and their depth does show…

through lack of trust and hesitation

when it comes to letting go and

letting anyone get close enough

to ever really know