On Love

By MercyRain

To say that I need you, I must then justify this need -- why do I need you. I need you because I feel loved; I feel special; I feel wanted. I need you because you open my eyes and open my views. I need you because you are strength when I am weak, perseverant when I am lazy, crazy when I am all too sane. I need you because, by example, you teach me how to feel; teach me how to rely upon my self; teach me what it means to be strong. I need you because you need me.
But need has nothing to do with love. Need gets int he way of love -- provides conditions of expectancies; provides a termination of affairs whenever those needs are fulfilled. Need does love a great disservice. To say I love you because I need you is selfish, not self-less, and means that I have no concept of what love truly is.
To say that I want you, I must justify this want -- why do I want you? I want you because I feel loved; I feel special; I feel needed. I want you because you are a great teacher of who I am and who we are -- inspiring me to new realms, new schisms, new identities. I want you because you help bring out the best in me. I want you because you help bring out the worst in me, and help me to evolve. I want you, too, out of familiarity and comfort.
But want has nothing to do with love. Want gets in the way of love -- provides conditions and expectancies; provides an avenue of stasis and staleness, stagnant. Want does love a great disservice. Thus, to say I love you because I want you means I have no concept of what love is.
I am far from a perfect love. To say I want you, I need you is not indicative of love. These are not the basis for love. Love is a state of being, a state of joy that no human word can approximate the feeling of, which is why we so often confuse want, need, lust, love. Love, as a state of being, does not fluctuate with the daily sufferings of life -- nor does it demonstrate itself in flowers and sex and wine. Love is not unrealistic expectations out of your lover -- love is not any expectation out of your lover. Love is not needing, not wanting, but something else entirely. Love is holy. Love is holy. To say otherwise is not love.

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.

Published on Monday, March 10, 2003. Filed under: "Essay"

Awards

May 31st, 2010

Comments on "On Love"

A former member wrote: Eloquent wisdom. Too often I have found myself caught up in the selfish aspects of what I thought was "love"...too often, my wants...my needs. Too many relationships I have ruined over the years by expecting something "in return" for my "love". Thank you for the wise words. Spot on.
A former member wrote: You took this poem from my favorite poet, Deepak Kailash Gupta. Here is his link of his original poem you took. The same title, On love http://www.deepakkailashgupta.info/fun-frolic/on-love/ Please try to write your own poem and not taking other people's poem without credited them. Thank's
On Wednesday, September 14, 2011, MercyRain (105) wrote:

I hate to break it to you but it's the other way around. He posted the poem in January of this year. You can tell by the earliest comment on this poem, March 10, 2003, or even that it was voted poem of the day May 31, 2010, precedes this poem by months or years. It was originally a love letter written for my wife just vaguely rewritten to be posted. I'm sorry that your favorite poet is a liar.
On Wednesday, September 14, 2011, SilentStalker (1047) wrote:

...at least put enough thought into a plagiarism accusation to make it believable...not only did you make yourself look like an ass, now you just showed us that your friend copied one of our member's works...he might not like you anymore, but we'd appreciate it if you tipped us off again if he posts anything else...
On Wednesday, September 14, 2011, MercyRain (105) wrote:

And I do appreciate all the concern and care this site, and I know you personally do, in fighting the tide of plagiarism on the net. :) Of everything I've ever writ, this is the most frequently copied... annoyed at the plagiarism yet humbled that something i write can actually have such a far-reaching effect...
On Wednesday, September 14, 2011, Feral (85) wrote:

Your friend's entry was posted in 2011. This was posted in 2003. MercyRain is not the plagiarist here.
A former member wrote: I first read this about 6 years ago and all I can say is to this day, you have touched my soul
A former member wrote: its as if you dissected the very essence of it and brought reason to feeling. i love it, such explanation, I swear this nails it PERFECTLY, and yet, i love how there is no true explanation of it. definitely one of my favorites
On Monday, May 31, 2010, DorothyValiga (11) wrote:

Nicely said.
On Tuesday, February 24, 2009, Spiritus_Frumenti (340) wrote:

you touched upon something very meaningful here...i agree with everything you said here...good to know some people have good sense of things in this world...-l-
A former member wrote: woke up to this great work this morning, but what is love? I think it was Kierkegaard who said "Love does not alter the beloved it alters itself"
A former member wrote: I havent had a DP account until just yesterday, but i came across your work about a year ago and have been referring to your definition of love ever since. You are an angel writer.
On Monday, July 11, 2005, peril_notion (87) wrote:

Beautiful... I feel as if you have reached into the depths of my soul and pulled my inner-most thoughts from within. Amazing. ~Heather
On Wednesday, January 12, 2005, ardneK (72) wrote:

That is very true, it clears the eyes of those who only see love as material, as a need or want, but it isn't an object, it just is. Thank you for this, it is beautiful beyond words - >|
A former member wrote: This has so much truth in it, its impossible to define love, and the term is thrown around too loosely to even mean anything now...amazing write
On Tuesday, May 13, 2003, DarkPoet (229) wrote:

Beautiful wisdom, thank you
On Monday, March 10, 2003, shadowsinthelight (146) wrote:

Yes, well said. So many do mistake passion, wants, needs for love. I have and most likely will again. It is hard to recognize you are in a fog until it clears. Whatever that means. S.