Selfish One

Too afraid to live yet too afraid to die,

A phenomena so precious yet we still cannot agree,
Obligated still, you insist of my persistence

To understand, yes perhaps our situations mirror,
But suppose you're built with something else?

Sands that led me here have long been washed away,
Perhaps you are the selfish one for asking me to stay

For all the pains endured and prayers that go unheard,
you can offer only
but some meaningless cliches?

Your "don'ts" and "waits" and words of timeless wit
fall no harder than the blind that preach free will,

A will so free upon a life never requested,

A will so free that shall be judged regardless of my faith,

A will so free that guilt imposed shall change the view in time
or so you hope for the sake of your indifference


You make me fucking sick with the world you are so proud of,

You make me fucking sick with the praises of your absent god,


Of all these things I plea and say,
In a world I only see grow darker,
I beg of you, never pressure me to stay,
For my only way to grin today,
May be sketched in dreams of slaughter.