This old gun, It's killed one,
this little tune I croon to myself as I contemplate the idea,
On what your love is like,
I'm dead inside,
aren't you happy,
You finally broke me,
all the twisted ideas twirling in my brain,
Like a merry go round,
so joyous taking me back to my child hood,
dark rooms, starvation, rape,
child pornography videos and convicting court dates,
A tourtured soul,
Oh tyler my dear foster brother,
are you finally happy now,
have you finally consumed enough,
have you ravaged every part of my innocence with your hatred enough,
This little pill, It's killed two,
well hello daddy,
so nice of you to finally know me,
can I ask you something,
did it make you feel alive with the blade in your hand,
or was it not enough until you cut open my face,
watching the skin slide open,
Oh how it vexed you that I did not cry right away,
the delicious taste of bitter sweet anger on my tongue,
did you feel more of a man as you hit me,
did I ever "learn my lesson",
or will it not be enough until my heart stops beating,
do you feel belittled also,
having everything stripped away until there is nothing left,
are you as worthless as you called me,
This shining knife, it's killed three,
Hello mom with your high standards,
will I ever be enough,
then would you care,
I tried for so long to be enough,
but what would it matter,
tossed back and forth between heartbreak and agony,
between all the "what if's", and "why didn't you's",
I don't care,
I'm finally numb,
This tight noose, it's killed four,
the clock is ticking,
this new gun it's killed...BANG!!,
now who will ever know?