...Rage of the Chemically Bludgeoned

By SolApathy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nco_kh8xJDs

Into the abyss of chemical anti-bliss
I twisted and tumbled
As you stand to only to make me stumble
Deep into exquisite loss of self
I became anything but myself
Battered by your help
Pills are my welts
Tied down with chemical-mental castration
Scream from within a locked box of damnation
I felt the hollowness of a voice I couldn’t tell was mine
The feeling chilling -- yet sublime --
Smiling you only see calm in me
Knowing what the drugs have stolen of thee
If only you knew -- my soul rejecting your curfew
Screaming to be free I’ll take any path to escape
Cheeking these pills you make me take
I smile in blissful deceit
As I begin to burn with clarity long forgotten
My brain burned with these drugs- Rotten
Scars of memories beneath
I scratch -- my wounds breathe free
Remind me of what it was to be me
Feel the song of life flowing deeply
~Know me broken by my master~
I break free and indulge chaotic disaster
Look into these chaos orbs of diabolical desire
Know you are the furnace of my fire
Inferno of ire damnation
I become your repudiation of all that is
I am my own salvation
Locks engage as alarms scream
I whisper upon this window -- my dreams
My lips intent clear I am driven by your fear
Break of the chain
Rage is my name
Adrenaline hate drives my fate
Break through the barriers of this clusterfuck parade
Orderlies lay out their sins as my scalpel severs them from within
Come way to far to come back—ever
Blood upon my body sticky sweet
Today I felt my heart finally beat
Camouflage of glorious ruin
In my mind -- I know you understood
Privilege of the needle borne
I whisper in violence of the oncoming storm
I twist my rage unto you
Beg as you feel the pills encroach
I shoved them all down your throat
Watching as you feel your sanity slip
Today I took you on a Permafied…Trip

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Published on Monday, December 18, 2017. Filed under: "Poetry"

Author's Note:

...Remiss, I thrive in my paroxysm of hatred's kiss

Comments on "...Rage of the Chemically Bludgeoned "

A former member wrote: Sometimes, you just have to snap and show people that they can't put you in a box, or make you personify their vision of the world and their views on normalcy. It's really sad that it takes people snapping and doing horrible things to get heard. The title is pure gold, dearest. Rebs:).
On Wednesday, December 20, 2017, dwells (4177) wrote:

Leaving the reader to guess at the you herein evoked: psychoanalyst, nurse Ratchet, supplier, tormented lover, pharmacopeia personified perhaps, or self-hatred maybe. Admittedly "I am my own salvation" (and possibly blood donor too). Just the right mixture to broaden the audience appeal. Cheers Sol! - Dan
On Tuesday, December 19, 2017, Drea (1388) wrote:

So when are you and Tom getting the bad together? I call manager! I want to hear this over guitar!
On Monday, December 18, 2017, Anna McCarra (357) wrote:

Chemically bludgeoned...the title itself speaks volumes. Very powerful.