Nursery Rhymes for Tiny Tots

Nursery Rhymes for tiny tots
Aren't always as they seem
Hidden deep within the books
Are stories left unseen

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star
How you wonder where you are
In back alleys getting high
Until you choke and then you die

Peter, Peter, Wife-Abuser
Had a wife but couldn't do her
So he locked her up away
Until he was done with his hooker.

The itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the bathroom wall
A little girl got scared to death
And killed him with her doll

Little Bo Peep
Met a guy online
And went out to go meet him
It turns out he was 44
And now she's not a virgin

Jack and Jill
Went up a hill
To have a little fun
Stupid Jill forgot her pill
And now they have a son

Little Miss Muffet
Died on her tuffet
After eating her curds and way
It seems that the spider
Had poisoned her cider
And now he's locked up away

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
Jack knocked over the candlestick
Burnt his home down to the ground
His ashen body never found

Rock-a-bye- Baby
On the tree top
Your daddy's in jail
Got felt up by cop
For snorting some crack
And beating up Momma
For saying she's leaving
And taking you with

Hansel and Gretel got lost in the woods
And were found by a wicked old witch
She killed Gretel and ate her up
Then had some fun with Hansel

Old King Cole was a perverted old soul
And a perverted old soul was he
He called for his penis
He called for a knife
And he called for his eunecs, three.

Nursery rhymes for tiny tots
Aren't always what they seem,
Hidden deep within the poems
Lie stories left unseen.