things undone
cannot be undone
lack of effort 
cannot be undone
you cannot change anything that you truly feel
increase or decrease the intensity
or alter the way that it will lead you
and feigning heartfelt change
thru something u could easily erase
its defeating to tell the truth
is it worse than what u already do
idk
but its safely packaged 
in all the passive relapses
that remind you of what you may have been sent here to do
if i never called u anything
would u still have said those things
or was it just easier to hide behind them
and pretend we werent suffering 
and live unhappily 
forever and after
shotgunned by the fear 
of blame or a connection
to these halflife disappearances