Elephant Blues

By Malcholm Dark

I was looking through an old book of medical oddities
and came across a picture of a man with elepantiasis
of the scrotum.  As a man I can feel for the pain and
torment he went through.  Having to wheel his junk
around on a small cart just to be mobile, must have
been somewhat degrading.  Still, there was something
humorous about the picture and I felt that this poor
fellow was deserving of a tribute...


Elephant Blues

My boys hang low, there isn't any hope
I use bible pages to twist up my dope.
And God must be laughing over the news
I've got a case of the elephant blues.

I need a small cart to get us around
My boys don't complain, not one little sound.
This life I am living, I didn't choose
I've got a case of the elephant blues.

My walk is funny, I can't really dance
I've no chance at all for any romance.
Women won't love me, I'm livin' to lose
I've got a case of the elephant blues.

"a-bee-bop-a-tickin'
my schlong's just a flickin'
the hair jell's a stickin',
so what's a man to do?"

"a-do-do-a-bummin'
it all starts a cummin'
Rosy Palm she's a hummin'
and her five sisters too."

I have nothing of value, which truly annoys
Except this picture of me and the boys.

My life ain't a dream, no peaches and cream
My boys are quite massive to the extreme.

If you know what I mean...
Yes my balls are quite massive to the extreme.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And if that ain't enough, let me tell you what...

"Does your boys hang low
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie'em in a knot
Can you tie'em in a bow?
Can you haul'em over your shoulder
like a giant boulder holder...
Does your boys hang low?"


Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2011 Malcholm Dark
Published on Saturday, August 20, 2011.     Filed under: "Tribute" and "Poetry"
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Comments on "Elephant Blues"

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  • lupus tenebrae On Wednesday, August 24, 2011, lupus tenebrae (860)By person wrote:

    Haha, with a blues theme as well? So he has the biggest balls in the bayou? Watch that Cajun spice, bigger balls means bigger burn. Sorry I missed this, had some disagreement with nature. Write onward. Scholar

  • A former member wrote: Haha, that's great. Scholar

  • alex herewane On Saturday, August 20, 2011, alex herewane (149)By person wrote:

    reminded me of easy rider the film great write

  • dwells On Saturday, August 20, 2011, dwells (4177)By person wrote:

    I remember that picture from National Geographic. All those potatoes and no meat! Stop the singing because it sounds like you're tone deaf and I know that song too!

  • Devilish On Saturday, August 20, 2011, Devilish (2633)By person wrote:

    Perfection.... What is a person to do with a poet like you? Loooooove em..... Scholar

  • elisa On Saturday, August 20, 2011, elisa (1595)By person wrote:

    balls. ..lol

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