Hopeless, can you sense it?
By veingo
I'm nearly always single.
I'm as hopeless as they come.
And woman aren't as attracted to hopelessness,
as I like to hope they'll be.
I could watch with my own eyes,
as you slowly undress to nothing.
Then slip into a gown that almost issen't there.
But seeing is not enough.
I could taste the lingering wine on your lips,
when you come to kiss me, as if I deserve it
just for the way I look at you.
But it wouldn't quinch my thirst.
I could smell your shampoo & perfume mingeling
with your natural scent, as you whisk your head up
to give me those eyes from the side.
But it would only intensify my craving.
I could feel the perfection of goose bumps
riseing from your soft, smooth skin, as I lay my arm over you
and trace my fingertips around your navel.
But I couldn't pull you close enough.
I could hear the words "good night" draw out to
a low, slow moan, as they rise from your breast to your lips
at the moment you sink into slumber.
But I'd still listen intently to your breathing.
I could want you in every sense of the word.
But the word wouldn't do justice to the feeling.
Because I'm the kind of guy for whom five senses,
just aren't enough.
So as I myself drift off to sleep
my last thought will surely be.
"God I hope I dream about "HER" tonight.
Comments on "Hopeless, can you sense it?"
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A former member wrote:
So did you? ;)
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On Tuesday, June 15, 2010, NikesRain
(1240) wrote:
i always come back to this when i need a smile and a sigh.... keep hoping you'll post something new though too ^.~
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On Friday, November 28, 2008, Leith Plunkett
(237) wrote:
your play on words around hope is exceptional. I found it very sad, but beautiful. A wonderful piece.
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On Friday, September 19, 2008, veingo
(526) wrote:
:)-
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A former member wrote:
I hope to god you do... love how the last line comes round to the title in a rather ironic way. But really, the sensitivity, the tenderness of expressions.... the particulars pieces parts, little windows on the world of feeling, of being with, that you provide with such careful expression, such tangible sensation, these capture the universal essence of what we come to love as love, to desire as desire, and to long for as if hope itself could fill the void. I can sense it, very well done, man, very nice work here, no doubt.
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On Sunday, June 29, 2008, Aunty Depressant
(423) wrote:
Why, yes I can. Well conveyed.
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A former member wrote:
I really love this...it gave me a weird mix of heartbreak and desire for you at the same time. That probably sounds like a total come-on, doesn't it? LOL I've never really read a piece that's inspired that type of feelings at the same time in me before. Absolutely beautiful.
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A former member wrote:
"But I couldn't pull you close enough." I just read the story of our lives. Well done, ole chap.
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A former member wrote:
"I'm nearly always single.
I'm as hopeless as they come..."... bet you didn't know you were writing about me..lol But I couldn't pull you close enough..."/and/"But I'd still listen intently to your breathing.
I could want you in every sense of the word.
But the word wouldn't do justice to the feeling.
Because I'm the kind of guy for whom five senses,
just aren't enough. "
*gasps*...this is exactly how I love when I am in love, this was wonderful ,~V~, I have missed your works.. and I am so jealous ..I wish I could be HER:) ~RAIN~
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On Wednesday, June 11, 2008, Daughter_Of_The_Moon
(106) wrote:
I ditto rain. So glad to see you another work of yours. How wonderful they all always are. She is lucky and still doesnt even seem to know what she has. -Heather-
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A former member wrote:
ahem and amen. ness
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A former member wrote:
Such a selfless write, your either a special dude, or a sly fox...either way you just got yourself emotionally layed....gr8 write man.
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On Thursday, May 29, 2008, veingo
(526) wrote:
Lol.....
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On Tuesday, May 27, 2008, Sparrow
(88) wrote:
So very lovely...
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On Tuesday, May 27, 2008, NikesRain
(1240) wrote:
like honey, sweeter with each sense you touched on here... and there is no way you're hopeless although i think you're probably around women that don't see enough with the intellect and heart they were given... this was too good to pick just one part of... thanks for the tingles and sighs
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A former member wrote:
Can I say there is nothing sexier than a guy who can articulate as well as this? That was beautiful...I felt like I was there.
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On Tuesday, May 27, 2008, Rebel tiGer King
(239) wrote:
i think i know who this is about :D excellent write brother, i like how this flows man, nice to see you posting again brother Ron, keep it up -symph-
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On Tuesday, May 27, 2008, BlacK_diamond_Bay
(4) wrote:
very deep write dude _Blackdiamond_
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A former member wrote:
oh i so relate to this. great write. (and i personally like a guy kinda down trot, so do most of my friends, lol)