Mr Flatulance

By silentninja

One sunny day
I had a flatulent butt
Silently I shopped
When the noise had to erupt

I diverted away from the beans
Had too many already at home
Yet to my surprise
The advertising guy
Forgot to turn off his microphone

It was placed at the rear
Of the supermarket store
When a parping sound
Echoed out the door

In embarrassment
I hunted for a back passage
Whilst customers complained
About my trumping message

It grew worse
When it was blamed on a feedback loop
When I parped again
I was standing next to the fruit

I'm sure the milk curdled
And the baby milk crawled
Whilst the commotion took place
I hid from the embarrassment of it all

When I thought things were over
And I was in the clear
In the store was my farting noise
Was all everyone could hear

Some people found it funny
Others were appalled
Now my name has changed
Mr. Flatulence is what I'm called

The moral of this story
I have saved till last
Don't go out shopping
When you have bad gas

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2013 silentninja
Published on Friday, July 26, 2013.     Filed under: "Poetry"
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Comments on "Mr Flatulance"

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  • Jonas Robinson On Thursday, October 17, 2019, Jonas Robinson (979)By person wrote:

    Nice ending. It surprised me, I almost thought it would be erotic, though it was comical. Thank you for sharing, and congrats. :)

  • dwells On Friday, July 26, 2013, dwells (5693)By person wrote:

    "Parping" is a fine bit of onomatopoeia, cheers to you SN - silent but deadly! (HA)

  • blue angel On Friday, July 26, 2013, blue angel (1117)By person wrote:

    lol.... love this... so funny !!! ~^_^~

  • A former member wrote: hilarious! fart poem, so great. we need more fart poems in this world!

  • xZombie Poptartzx On Friday, July 26, 2013, xZombie Poptartzx (484)By person wrote:

    This was definitely entertaining! It made me laugh haha. xoxox

  • tammysoleno On Friday, July 26, 2013, tammysoleno (77)By person wrote:

    very funny and enjoyable I had a smile on my face

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