Creeping

By veingo

He crept out in the dark of the night,
in the cold
with the moon
and the stars
shinning bright

And he crept along the road,
and he noticed
his shoes didn't
make any tracks
in the snow.

And he crept through a field,
like a breeze
and heard nothing at all
but the wind
in the trees

And he crept through the gate,
in a yard, in the back of a house
that it seemed
he recalled.

And he thought of his childhood, and how he'd believed
it would all be
much better by now.

When we're young and we're feeling afraid,
we naively believe
that adulthood is safe.

And I saw you creep.

I saw you creep.

And he crept through the yard,
to the door
and he crept on inside,
and did not touch the floor.

And he crept up the stairs, down the hall
all the while wishing,
he'd never been there
at all.

And he crept in the room, where the boy
who'd fell out of his bed
lay asleep
on the floor.

And he put the boy back in his bed.
Pulled his blanket back on.
Placed a kiss
on his head.


And the boy had a dream of a man,
who himself dreamed of being
a child once again.

When we're grown and we're feeling the strain,
it's our youth that we'd give,
anything to reclaim.

And I saw you creep.

I saw you creep.

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Veingo
Published on Thursday, October 6, 2005.     Filed under: "Philosophical" and "Poetry"
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Comments on "Creeping"

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  • A former member wrote: This has the feeling of a ghost... it's beautiful in an innocent haunting way... walking through a life that isn't yours...

  • Dreaming in Stanzas On Sunday, July 29, 2012, Dreaming in Stanzas (293)By person wrote:

    I think this is my favorite poem I've read of yours and knowing the inspiration behind it makes it all the more amazing. I wish I could translate my own subconscious into words but alas, that capability eludes me.

  • veingo On Sunday, June 7, 2015, veingo (526)By person wrote:

    What ever happe ed to you, lovely? ^V^

  • A former member wrote: you worded this so great made me think to check the trees and the breze

  • ColorMeToxic On Sunday, December 11, 2011, ColorMeToxic (238)By person wrote:

    OMG! You've left me unable to find my words...bookmarked. Scholar

  • A former member wrote: wicked piece Scholar

  • Ladyhawke On Tuesday, August 10, 2010, Ladyhawke (392)By person wrote:

    All i can say. . . WOW! a perfect piece. totalllly classify this as art! Keep it up man.

  • Liz On Thursday, October 25, 2007, Liz (265)By person wrote:

    nice structure. lots going on without wasted words, the repetition is a nice pattern. love how it ends

  • A former member wrote: This is trully a poetic writing. It takes you for a ride, but you never even knew it happened until it's over. +FtF+

  • A former member wrote: so true so true...I've felt it creeping, I know I'm creepy... I mean creeping. If only to catch a glimpse of youth creeping up to me. I love the dream metaphor and the circle!!

  • A former member wrote: fucking hell, ron. this is crazy, and perfectly penned. "When we're young and we're feeling afraid, we nievely belive that adulthood is safe." there are a bajillion lines i'd love to quote here. this is one of your best, for sure.

  • weyvern On Sunday, December 25, 2005, weyvern (80)By person wrote:

    i love this and it is the best of your poems i think love it! i am a huge fan of your poetry keep it up

  • A former member wrote: "When we're grown and we're feeling the strain, it's our youth that we'd give, anything to reclaim." AH! You are so lovely dear...

  • A former member wrote: I am saddened that it took so long for me to find this, and that I only found this through your asking me to view it...this is so very wonderful...every emotion, every line...has driven a nail into my heart...

  • A former member wrote: This was positively superb, and I am so very glad that you mentioned it to me. To have missed something so wonderful...would have been disasterous to my health. Beautiful piece...gotta fave it. *Evangel*

  • Serenity On Friday, October 7, 2005, Serenity (469)By person wrote:

    This was wonderful. The image and emotion was vivid. And the set up just gave this more power.

  • redtearswhitesnow On Friday, October 7, 2005, redtearswhitesnow (79)By person wrote:

    ohh the images,the images.

  • capt_funguy On Thursday, October 6, 2005, capt_funguy (777)By person wrote:

    this was dead on superb simplicity ... to really understand what you're seeing ... to understand the silhouettes as they move ... great , just great ... funguy

  • A former member wrote: reminds me of Boo Radley... always loved Boo.... ~ness~

  • blue On Thursday, October 6, 2005, blue (1409)By person wrote:

    Nice. Real nice.. quite a picture you've painted.. an altogether vision of truth. Beautiful. *use spell check! use spell check!* :) ~b

  • Err0r On Thursday, October 6, 2005, Err0r (358)By person wrote:

    I love the transition 'And I saw you creep. I saw you creep.' Wonderful write. I can't wait for another read from you. =)

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