in exchange
By manunkind
this is my go at free verse, it's
about the weakness of man kind-
Oh Christmas tree
Oh Christmas tree
In how many ways
Do you bring joy to me?
Little candles
Beautiful ornaments
Every year
I deck upon thee
This year…
I tried to make
An ornament
Unlike the others
Something real
Not so fake
I bought
Red glass balls
At the local
K-mart
I cut out little
Sayings
I dyed you pink
And green
I wanted you to be
Special
I wanted the ornament
To sheen
To scream
But,
It wasn’t quite perfect
It wasn’t
What it was meant to be
I smashed it upon
Floor
Took another ball
From the box
Good thing I-
Had bought more
This Christmas was
Gunna rock!
I took the second
Ball
Again,
I glued upon it
Beautiful words
Pretty sayings
Saintly decorations
The perfect addition
To your branches
With my name,
It was branded.
A masterpiece
To me,
It was
My heart
Poured into
Something so
Small, so stupid
I left to find
The final adjustment
A hook
To
Hang
My soul,
My ornament
Upon you,
My tree
As I entered my room
A prize in my hand
I was happy,
I felt as if something really
Mattered
And I saw on the floor,
My master piece
SHATTERED.
And I cried
I cried for all that I was worth
Fuck you god.
Its all your fault!
[my birth]
and still I cried
if even a glass ball
cannot survive
than why is it
i
have been
Sentenced to alive?
We HAD A FUCKING DEAL GOD!
I was special
Unlike the rest
Of all your children
I WAS THE BEST!
The best?
Wasn’t i?
And I fell
I fell helpless upon
The floor
Begging the god
Begging for more!
I am everything!
But why is my soul torn?
I wish!
I fucking wish I was
NEVER GOD DAMNED BORN!
And I held
The shattered remnants
In my ill-fated hand
I looked at my shiny red
Reflection
And i..
I demanded..
WHY?
Me?
I took one of the pieces
Of my oh so broken heart
I took them
And with them
I tore myself apart
Blood like blossoms
Blood
So red
If only god,
IF ONLY
I WERE
DEAD!
And cried
And I said
I said
you make me
live…
and in exchange for the pain
my belief
you make me decorate
your Christmas tree?
Comments on "in exchange"
-
A former member wrote:
i am still completely enthralled by this peice.
-
On Saturday, December 20, 2003, Recycled
(93) wrote:
Ut-oh. I am running out of ways to praise your work. Pieces like this set a new standard for others to follow. Too original to ever be duplicated.
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On Thursday, December 18, 2003, unusual_blood
(74) wrote:
Love how you wrapped this one up. You took the words right out of my mouth, right out of my soul, right out of my heart. So ironic how in the end, in "exchange for the pain" we end up "decorating xmas trees" ...
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On Friday, December 12, 2003, manunkind
(64) wrote:
thanks! i really appreaciate your comments!
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A former member wrote:
I agree whole-heartedly with past comments; this was quite well done.... oh, and I eat dogs; tastes like chicken ;)
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A former member wrote:
Wow...this tore me apart as I read it. Such despair was held within these words.
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On Thursday, December 11, 2003, Drifter
(265) wrote:
This is awesome, great job here.
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On Thursday, December 11, 2003, A Velvet Tongue
(434) wrote:
nice use of metaphor here...very profound piece! liked it a lot!