Animus ~ chthonic

At the end
I found myself
lost
chasing along the wretched trails
I expected my future self
to have taken...
tracking a freeze-dried heart-
such treacherous toil to undertake
with kidnapped karma
held hostage and pleading 
eyes puffy and drugshot 
                  looking 
        lonely
like the darting desperation 
they interrogate their surroundings with...

malevolent enmity or animus entity- 
sometimes the punctuation 
is responsible 
for more than just noticing
irredeemable flaws...
We'll get an exclamation-
one-time-use, single-serve, disposable-
to toss at the end of our death sentence
but I will not be denied
credit for the time I've already served 
to this fucking life.

It was never meant to float
but rock bottom still feels
faster and faster
the faster I sink...

The scratching in the walls
serves notice- 
perpetual carving
the artist within
claws c
           l
            o
               s
                   e
                        r
               to my dying room...
my TV has seen it coming
refuses to be plugged in
but to channel its fear to me...
used to whisper panicked pleas
now I hear speakers
that only scream
             and scream
                   and Scream
             and ScrĘam
                            and ŠÇRÄ–ÅM.....

agony vibrates
a riot in waiting-
the revolution was televised 
but we were too busy 
watching commercials…
bled dry and withered 
with no.thing left to offer 
lungs overflowing with debris {
tsunami souvenirs of a tidal religion...
Refuse to be satiated 
by *current* events-
for those who sample the Kool-Aid know:
being dragged out by the undertow 
is the only free ride
you can trust...