Crushing pain in my heart
Loving, Missing, Crying
For you

I envision it now
Pull the trigger
Draw the blade
Swallow the pills

The blood pours out
It is infected
Infected with pain 
Pure liquid pain

The pain spreads
To you
To them
But I am dead

No I musn't 
I must keep it inside
You all are too precious
The pain must only be mine

I drop the gun
Throw the knife
Flush the pills
And shut the door

I will keep it locked inside
Protect you
From the pain
The infected blood