Dear Mama

Dear mama, how are you?
I need your help on what to do
I'm not the same as when I left
My heart lies broke within my chest

Remember the man that did me in?
The one that called me trash and then
told the world how bad I was?
Mama, tell me he was wrong...

The past few months have been a blur
I drank until it didn't hurt
I've done some things I know were bad
But mama, that phase didn't last

He told me I'm not worth his time
I hung up the phone, but couldn't cry
Instead I thought for many nights
Mama, what if he was right?

I know years ago, I upset you
when I cut myself and I blamed you
This time though, the fault's on me
I hurt myself again, you see

I am not proud of who I am
I know that I had cracked this man
Am I heartless, dead, and cold?
Mama, do I have a soul?

I've made many mistakes up until now
But the stains from them just won't come out
You said crying never solved a thing
But mama, I can't hold it in

I've been reaching out, but I'm alone
At times, I'd die to come back home
help me fix what's in my head
I've heard, mama, that you know best...