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I grieved for you beneath the stars again



A mosaic masterpiece displaying




the proficiency of my self-loathing
I can’t seem to replace this breaking that occurs from behind my eyes
Consisting of lies, shallow, impure, tragic reflections of us
Left unadorned, a trust left worn


As you leave me here

To think over the atrocities of your morphine


I die Trapped inside sleep
Despair resumes for another round

You lick the corner of my lips like pain
Like the fine cunning edge of my favorite razorblade
That spin the crimson lines of my demise



“Well ‘darling’, you wanted to see my reds.”

-here you fucking have it-




So intricately my blood falls on your tongue
N I know you’ll never taste the true essence of my wasted grace


Which you stole from me

an Inebriated awakening grabs all of me N shakes me viciously

I’m losing you tonight
Oh how I’m missing you already


In spite your reverie of false connections
Spread beneath your sweet nothings
That lay scattered at your feet

Leaving me Embracing pain without gain

Just the venom you spit through your teeth

Into my mouth, claims of love

That melts through my tongue like clouds of cotton candy
Equated to the consistency of a love I thought I’d be able to hold
Too many reasons to lose trust
Have me curled at the foot of your bed

Shedding drunk tears paired with my cynical laughter

As I feel your silence stabbing me in the back
Giving rise to a birth of disdain


Your lips part with a smoldering invitation
Of a quick sweet death
in the web spun with your self-deprecated anger
That my jilting sardonic laughs intensified

As I read the words that declared you foreign to me out loud

I want to scream at you defiantly


“Say it.. SAY IT
Say you love me
So I can reach into your arsenic lips
N tear your fucken voice box out”

You can’t swallow my words
Those said out loud
Those that gaze at you unspoken from beneath my eyes
your bullet wounds
trapping themselves on your fragile wings

they Collapse your pride to unveil
A beaten flutter of glittering lust
Permeating through my cherry filled mouth

I’m muttering beneath my breath

Please


-PLEASE-

Don’t take this away from me
I can’t take the pain of losing my dearest companion



Even if we’re always in the dark
Feeling our way through our words



But tonight in silence we breathe
N in mental wars we die
Just you N I
Breathing death in silent suicide.


Can’t help wonder



Is this how you wanted it to be
Is this what you wanted from me
Is this what -w e- were waiting for



As all is forsaken in a night

I’m the one left standing holding the gun
Into my parted lips

As I watched in fruitless resolve
Ten feet away
Your fragile world

---Where you left me to watch
just so you could stand and watch me back---



IT’S MY TURN TO WALK AWAY


You lost me here


Inside your last dream



The one you woke from
But keep coming back to

N I suppose I’ll be here


Wondering if you’ll ever find the courage to stay






-Maybe we’re better off this way-


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