Survival Of A Small Town Girl

Isolated from much of the world,
Then being forced out against her will,
This is the state she’s in now;

Where she doesn’t want to be is where she’s been hurled,
So much that it almost makes her want to kill,
But she will survive this somehow is her vow;

She wants to be loved so very badly,
She looks for it in all the wrong places,
Taking anything she can possibly get;

Believing someone loves her so madly,
In each and everyone of the cases,
Her being deceived she won’t admit;

She’s now accustomed to being told she’s loved,
Even though sometimes she wishes it weren’t so,
She really does like hearing it said;

She’ll just keep letting herself get shoved,
Only by the people she somehow likes though,
Just so she’s not alone when she’s dead;

She’ll get mixed up with three different men,
Not having a clue as to which one to take,
Someone will indefinitely get hurt either way;

Not knowing how, let alone when,
She’s trying to decide if anyone is fake,
No matter what someone will have to pay;

Sometimes one will have the power to scare her,
But she still keeps him around,
For fear of his or her heartbreak;

She never really is truly sure,
How she made this web she wound,
Or the damage left by her wake;

We all know that she’ll back out each time,
But she’ll never get to explain herself,
Not that it could possibly help anyway;

She just keeps making this climb,
With all of her utmost stealth,
Until that long awaited day;

The day she comes crashing back down,
Taking everything and everyone down as she goes,
No matter how she tries to make it stop;

She just doesn’t want to be alone in town,
But deep down inside she still knows,
It’s a long climb back to the top;

She believes in true love with all her heart,
And knows somewhere is her one and only,
She’s just getting way too confused;

She keeps tearing these people apart,
Making herself that much more lonely,
Laughing at all of those she’s abused;

She hides her own pain deep inside,
No one knows her worst fears,
Fears of total collapse in this life;

She has no one in which she can confide,
Other’s problems is all she eve hears,
Never ending her nearly unbearable strife;

She sees people confident and happy,
And longs to be in their shoes,
Wishing that was the life she had;

Inside she hopes maybe it can be sappy,
And she won’t always have to lose,
And forever stay so sad;

All she wants it somewhere to go,
Someone to help her get her start,
A friend, a lover, just anyone;

Someone that can help her grow,
She just can never seem to play the part,
The one that has at least won;

She’s positive she can’t do it alone,
New city, new friends, new school,
That’s just beyond her reach;

Just throw the poor girl a bone,
She doesn’t deserve to always be the fool,
All she wants is someone who can teach;

As she gets older she sees how bad she wants out,
She wants to be among society,
And have a life of her very own;

She’s just filled with all of this doubt,
If she really does have the ability,
To not come crashing down;

Her friends think they know her plans,
But that’s not how she wants it to be,
She wants to live her dream not theirs;

She just can’t get around her own mind’s bans,
And figure out how she’s going to be free,
Without disregarding everyone else’s cares;

She thought that love was the key,
But she was terribly wrong,
That just brought confusion and heartache;

She just wishes that she could see,
How this won’t take so long,
And if it’s more than she can take;

She still wants to find her soul mate,
And live happily ever after if she may be so bold,
But she’s sure she can’t do it yet;

She has to learn to leave this up to fate,
She is only a mere seventeen years old,
Too young for her love to have met;

Or so she’s starting to think now,
Even if she never ever would admit it,
Her faith she’s now starting to lose;

She’s wondering if she could even go,
Thinking that this is all just bullshit,
Giving up on waiting for good news;

But then one person gives her hope,
Tells her he cares about her,
And honestly wishes her happiness;

She starts to realize that she can cope,
And knows that was something she had to learn,
And she did even with her stubbornness;

This one person gave her so much,
With just that one tiny line,
And makes her smile even this time;

She’s happy even through the pain and such,
And knows that he made her shine,
Even through all of life’s grime;

Her guardian is what she sees him as now,
There to pick her back up once more,
Even if he has no clue of this;

Each and every time she gets down,
He shows her that she can soar,
And this blame is all his;

So even if he’s not here to hold her hand,
He is almost everything she needed,
Even if she is still all alone;

To her it seems as if it were all planned,
Every time their discussions get quite heated,
He may keep her from being an old lonely crone;

And while she’s still very scared,
She knows this can be done,
She now has that someone, that friend;

For the future she’ll try and be prepared,
Her anxieties are still far from none,
But this is very far from her end.