'Leaving Hope' behind...

By Peyton1

The sound you hear is merely the smoldering remains of my once grand existence.
The smoke rises and drifts aimlessly,
as lost
as my will
 for resistance.
~~~~~~
Words that I had
so longed
to hear
spoken,
echoed loudly across this desolate plane.
Was it all mis-taken?
The dark flame now rekindles, to burn with blinding pain.
~~~~~~
The steam from hot tears against my cheeks
leads to a view through impeded vision.
I allowed my heart
to make a decision,
I again so suffer
the afflictive incision.
~~~~~~
I grasp in vain for even an unstable grip
my reality darkens six hundred shades of grey.
I am now unsure
if I still believe
in tomorrow
or even
want
it
if it's the same as today.
~~~~~~
A
single
thread is
all that endures
I must now cling to it
'til my hands aren't able.
If it too should finally snap
there'll be no reprieve, 'Leaving Hope' and dreams as a fable.
~~~~~~
She made me promise not to drift into the shadows,

I
may
for
the
first
time
ever,
break
my
word.

As the rope keeping me now quickly unravels,

Suddenly
life
in
this
place
just
seems
absurd.
~~~~~~

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2014 Peyton1
Published on Thursday, January 2, 2014.     Filed under: "Depressed" and "Poetry"

Author's Note:

my pain surfaces, after the holidays spent alone
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Comments on "'Leaving Hope' behind..."

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  • A former member wrote: This one is truly sad and beautiful.. Your words flow with such naturalness, intensity and honesty.. I felt like a part of your poem.. Somehow I was partaking of your feelings of sadness and broken hope.. I understand such things very good.. Thank you for sharing :)

  • MorganaRose On Tuesday, July 8, 2014, MorganaRose (75)By person wrote:

    This was so wonderful crafted. It flows beautifully as if the words just came crying out...the format so natural and so powerful to your words. Every image was so vivid that it seemed to twist my heart to the rhythm of your words.

  • Peyton1 On Tuesday, July 8, 2014, Peyton1 (183)By person wrote:

    Your comment is very kind miss Morgana, I do certainly appreciate it. This one was a depression that nearly claimed me, I'm still not sure I made it completely out. A part of me didn't, I know because it's still missing. If heartache was a job title, I for sure would get the position! I have plenty enough experience for it anyway, aah it's not important. Thanks for commenting on my work, I had a lot more on here until I deleted about 25 of 'em. Talk to ya later................................... ~ACE~

  • blue angel On Tuesday, January 21, 2014, blue angel (908)By person wrote:

    Visually the unraveling of your poem is pleasing. Yet, is felt with a warming sensation that quickly turns into a rope burn as it twists tightly around your heart. It's painful to read and you display it so gracefully, though. Smile for me hotrod :)~ You'll find your footing very soon. I've read this one before but had trouble responding... still it feels as though my words fall flat.

  • Peyton1 On Wednesday, January 22, 2014, Peyton1 (183)By person wrote:

    Thank you so much or your comment miss Kendra. Your words are far from falling flat. The pain will go away one day, I guess. After the knot loosens, the knot where my heart used to be....

  • FadedBlues On Monday, January 20, 2014, FadedBlues (2282)By person wrote:

    ...heartbreaking & well written. get a fresh bottle & start the party again...

  • Peyton1 On Tuesday, January 21, 2014, Peyton1 (183)By person wrote:

    Thanks for reading FB. A few fresh bottles of 200proof might help a little. Though there probably won't be any more parties....... Thanks again for reading and the comment, see ya.....

  • Intoxicating Delirium On Thursday, January 9, 2014, Intoxicating Delirium (300)By person wrote:

    Into the dark depths of hopeless depression.. This is a wonderful write and I love the format too... Fantastic job, pain can be so beautiful..

  • Peyton1 On Thursday, January 9, 2014, Peyton1 (183)By person wrote:

    I don't yet know how deep I will sink into it, but there sure seems to be no way out. Maybe I get engulfed this time....who knows. Serves me right I guess. Thanks for commenting miss Caitlin, see ya.....

  • dwells On Thursday, January 2, 2014, dwells (4531)By person wrote:

    Darkest before the dawn Peyton and now I've gotta post something to perk you up. Perhaps a few limericks? Cheers lad!

  • Peyton1 On Thursday, January 2, 2014, Peyton1 (183)By person wrote:

    I'm afraid there may not be a dawn this time, got the dark part right though. thanks for readin dude....see ya

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