My family tree is a twisted oak...

My hair is shaggy and red
I eat possum, I'm inbred
No school books, no good looks
I'm dumb and ugly instead.

"Hand me my banjo, Jed."

My mamma's brother is my pa...
On this here mountain we're the law.


Brother is called whiskey Jed
Sugar and corn fill the shed
No seeds to grow, no fields to sew
We make moonshine here instead.

"Hand me my banjo, Jed."

Our mamma's nephew is his pa...
On this here mountain we're the law.


This love for my sister is unsaid
She is thirteen and we were just wed
A pretty thing, you know what I mean
Our weddin' cake was made of cornbread.

"Hand me my banjo, Jed."

Her mamma's uncle is her pa...
On this here mountain we're the law.


We keep the shine in the woodshed
That's where you'll find brother Jed
and Grandpa Ed
and Pappa Zed
and Uncle Fred
and Cousin Ned
and me...
strummin' the banjo instead.

"Hand me my sippin' jug, Jed."

We are all related somehow...
Time to bring this mountain down.


I am a mountain banjo playin' fool
With two extra thumbs, the music sounds cool
So fast and mean, a playin' machine
Come one, come all and see the banjo rule.

"Crank up the volume, Jed."

My mamma's sister's cousin's aunt is my daughter
Have a real good time, but don't drink the water.