Another Sleepless Night

It is at the cost of others’ hopes
That I could ever decide to chronicle
Your exquisite, honeyed words
Or to expose our lives, my lies, to them.

Missing,

Residing,

Restraint,

The struggle:
It’s such a disagreeable thing,
One of which seems
To only grow in longevity
And intensity.

You are my everything,
And I know I’m just being impatient,
Selfish, as always.
It’s just like my nature:

An intolerable aggravation;
To want You always near me;
To dream You and wake in longing.
It loves to take it’s hold, to taunt me.
With every lost second, I yearn to scream:
“I love You!” “I adore You!” “I love Him…”

I can’t even explain,
Can’t find the right words.
It takes my every breath to try.
Just another sleepless night…

Yet, everyday, You save my life.

Like homemade video tapes,
Like my notebook pages,
Fluttering as butterfly kisses,
Like rewriting history books,
It’s impossible to articulate
How we are to document our ardor
Or to broadcast our passions,

Living,

Breathing,

Loving through a crystalline glass lens.