An old work that last night I unburied. Something here from the dark ages... Enjoy.


-


I’m afraid.
Show me how to fight it.
Save me.
I’m not sure I can escape it.
Hold me.
If only it weren’t so useless.
In the end,
I know I’ll only regret it.

Trying to draw in breath
But there isn’t any air.
Every single day
Is a new nightmare.

Anger and tension
Strangle life out of me.
Lies place a canvas of uncertainty
Over my eyes, a shadow of deceit.

Patience is wearing thin
As my strength is running out.
Can’t quell the voice within
That fills me with doubt.

Comfort is found in your arms.
Love was always my lifetime low.
Do I know if I can even love?
Not enough experience to know.

Why does my mind go blank,
Just as I penetrate my own shell?
I have so much to say, though,
Not enough lifetimes to say it well.

I try to reach out, but I sank
Too deeply into the dark, blank.

Dismal ones dream
As glad ones cry.

Loneliness would be bearable
If I were actually ever alone.

Hold me down,
I will live again.
Hold me under,
I will breathe again.
Watch me pull you in,
A welcome into sin.

Let me,
Help me
Die.