Comments by All Members
- "I suppose overall the message of this piece is fairly weak. It is sort of halting. Stop and go, if you know what I mean. The visuals are somewhat vague, nothing particularly striking. I understood the point you were trying to convey and it is Definitely there. Just need a bit of polishing. I feel like the last stanza was meant to be sort if Luke the nail in the coffin that drove the point home but I don't feel it really pushed the piece over the edge that it needed. Your vocabulary is a bit dull but that may just be my personal taste, a bit of flare and elequence really makes a piece for me. Please don't strangle me for saying these things. They are just my harsh critics eye opinion and please feel free to rip me apart if you comment back because I am guilty of all these things and more, to be sure. This just isn't your best piece from what I've read so far. I love you please don't hurt me."
Posted by Lydia Jade on "Living Obituary Lives" by Lab Rat
- "As long as you're still breathing...the story never ends....hope stifles the thrum of heartbreak...just not on the nights you can't seem to find it...write on Bry ♡"
Posted by Karma Doll on "Living Obituary Lives" by Lab Rat
- "The title plays a key part in the writing to me. It sets a strong basis for the rest, and to me that includes a setting. I feel this way often, honestly. Though perhaps I may add a darker spin to it if I were to ever express my views on the winter chills."
Posted by Iron Blood Orphan on "Winter's Doorway" by Lab Rat
- "Sharp and detailed to a point. Very rhythmic and wound well with despair and solitude. I love how it twists its way to the end. Also an interesting rhyme scheme pattern. I like this. Well done :-)"
Posted by sIo on "The Mad King's Tower" by Lab Rat
- "That was like nails on a chalkboard in a room full of blind people. Intensely profound."
Posted by sIo on "Bites" by Lab Rat
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