Harrison Versus Eisenhower (Solomonic Confidence)

What’s that guy’s name
I don’t remember what it was
Was it Solomon? No, that was the king.
It was S something I just don’t remember
It was the guy with the hair
No, the other one
The one that got his strength
And that woman cut off all his hair
Was it Samson?
Whatever, I’m not shaving my beard.

What was the make and the model of that car?
Was it a Honda Civic or a Toyota Camry
It was probably mid-90s, I think it was green
The woman had a husband with sunglasses and a camera
When they ran over my glasses
Oh well, I probably shouldn’t have run into their car

I’ve trimmed as far as I can go
I’m not shaving my chin
Before you can’t see it
And I just look fourteen again
The girls are dying their hair
And are piercing their ears
I’m washing my face and
Growing a beard

What’s my line?
Anybody, does anyone realize
I’m not being ironic
I’m improvising
I can’t come up with anything
Anything
I can’t come up with anything
Anything
I can’t come up with everything this late at night

When my beard gets cleaner maybe I’ll look like an indie rocker!

I’ve trimmed as far as I can go
I’m not shaving my chin
Before you can’t see it
And I just look fourteen again
The girls are dying their hair
And are piercing their ears
I’m washing my face and
Growing a beard

Has it been 28 days already
This time then it was warm
What can you tell me about the weather tomorrow
Nobody knows it and everyone admits it

Which president didn’t have any hair
His bald, shiny head glistened at night
He was a solid white outline
He commanded attention
That was Eisenhower
I can’t believe you didn’t know that
He shaved it in the war
That’s why they called him Ike

Or not

I just made that up, I guess.

I’ve trimmed as far as I can go
I’m not shaving my chin
Before you can’t see it
And I just look fourteen again
The girls are dying their hair
And are piercing their ears
I’m washing my face and
Growing a beard