Leave Me Alone

In the darkest hour
the stillness of the night
leads my mind astray
and
As I lay here I wonder
what or lives would be like
had we done everything right
Would my sol still ache for rain
as I live out in this desert
pretending to be
rocked to sleep by the hollow cries of thunder
shattering in the distance
Would I still feel this hopeless and bleak
heartache and regret
constantly consume me
as I watch
my family cop out
by assuming Im just a freak
and
blame my issues on all the tweak
I do
They want me to turn around
go another route
yeah right
this road I've chosen only goes one way
and
theres no such thing as a uturn
I don't know what all the fuss is about
my heads filled with doubt
if my heart had a voice
it would shout
FUCK YOU
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
WHEN I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE
yesterday is from what I learn
only I don't know whats real or imagined anymore
Lost in the smoke
feelings
I must conceal
like dope
so shut the door and
lock it
pretend I'm not home
in hopes that everyone
will fucking leave me alone