When I Had Razors For Friends

By Loserland

Nobody would guess where I am
Talking with an old friend again
Mr. Razor Blade and I go way back
My only outlet when the world went black
I revealed to him only, my debilitating pain
So why do I still feel like a disillusioned teen?
Lonely, isolated, confused, and full of self-torment
I have returned for a glimpse of my self-repent
…
Mutilation
It’s hidden
But I’m not shameful
It was a bad day
A bad week, a bad month
A bad year, a bad decade
I suffered loss
My life became overshadowed
By my death
My love for the blood
To see the blood flow to the floor
Hooked on a deadly rush
Feeling bad became so good
Lost in a life with lack of control
The only control I could muster
Was the power to destroy myself
Every night was a challenge
My addiction got worse
Skin grew paler than ever
Blood became my graffiti
I painted the walls with my pain
A deep dark pit of sick pleasure
Eventually I tunneled out
But I am not ashamed
I expressed my self-hatred and survived
To hate another day
Blood loss saved my life
How’s that for irony

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.

Published on Saturday, October 18, 2003. Filed under: "Poetry"

Comments on "When I Had Razors For Friends"

On Saturday, November 13, 2004, Savannah (218) wrote:

I absolutely love this. Now, you need to read my "Silent Prayer" I'm sure you can relate.. wonderful write, just wonderful
On Friday, October 15, 2004, Nesfurata (58) wrote:

I still love this poem it is amazing. -Elizabeth
On Tuesday, October 12, 2004, BeautifulCalamity (428) wrote:

"I painted the walls with my pain" .. i feel a relation here in the way i have felt.. well written and conveyed words..
On Wednesday, August 25, 2004, Nesfurata (58) wrote:

That was very good. I love it. You were right our poetry does have some similarities. I understand what it's like to live that life perfectly. Great job! -Elizabeth
On Saturday, August 21, 2004, AHHH (184) wrote:

wow awesome write..."The only control I could muster Was the power to destroy myself" great line
On Saturday, October 25, 2003, Cinn (152) wrote:

wow, you're stuff is just so...wow, love it
On Tuesday, October 21, 2003, hate_doll (263) wrote:

::shivers:: the truth and dismal edge to this overwhelming...love it, like always :)
On Sunday, October 19, 2003, ghost (13) wrote:

seems you and i have the same friends, the darkness it hates us, in fact never leaving our sides. very nice!! you captured the emotion well,again nice!!
On Sunday, October 19, 2003, cre (410) wrote:

This is a good write . . it splays out the truth and offers a look into the world that more than one of us here have known . . very nice job. But I hope you stay away from that world now.
A former member wrote: good thrilling good yet again. Drake
A former member wrote: your social diversity is intriguing. the whole thing about painting you blood on the walls as gravity... is there a hidden meaning there?
On Saturday, October 18, 2003, Loserland (113) wrote:

more of a literal one
On Saturday, October 18, 2003, Drea (1388) wrote:

i agree with demo. this poem is me. every last word. thank you for posting. ~Drea~
On Saturday, October 18, 2003, Demosthenes (155) wrote:

see? there IS such thing as a good cutting poem. -B
On Saturday, October 18, 2003, KittyStryker (710) wrote:

"It was a bad day/A bad week, a bad month/A bad year, a bad decade".. seriousy. it's been a bad life. lol! and i liked "I expressed my self-hatred and survived/To hate another day"... well put.
A former member wrote: Wicked ... but nice.. i love it. *~angel~*