"Bleed"

under the skin it itches
I scratch it until the skin runs raw with blood
the seemingly innocent cut
like paper,
then you hear the music and loss control.
one cut deeper, each time
no thoughts of god, no thoughts of death
on the music running in and out of you
feeling it all give way to temptation.

I hurt a man today, he said he loved me,
and today I bleed for him,
yesterday it was for the loss......
to day it is for the gain.
how do I deserve to gain?
how can I feel any more.
wrapped up in my music, I feel safe again
with out this one cosine, this one crutch
I am gone.

crying now, and dying now,
hearing the words in me as they echo in my mind
they leave me as I sing the words
and with each word, a bit of that pain,
escapes me with the words.
with the cut escapes my soul,
the tears running down my face,
I can't do this.
and the words are flowing form me now as if the pain
will all go away.

so now here I sit writing trying to keep my self whole
why did he have to say he loved me,
why did I hurt him,
today I bleed for him
tomorrow I bleed for no one.