forgive me for the scars

Every scar on your heart
spells out my name
between my careless slicing
and kisses
i tell you i`m sorry
yet i do not know the meaning
of the word

and while i`m stuttering over
hollow apologies
your holding me
like a child holds on to their
favorite teddy bear
with stuffing bleeding from
the tears

i had that dream again
last night
a glimse into the fantasy land
where i`m actually
Happy
i hated it
almost as much as i hate you
i awoke with tears in my eyes
do you know how long its been
since i felt enough to cry

the only satifaction i get
is knowing your mine
my mind mustve took a wrong turn
on this road we call life
and somehow ended up twisted
like cars in an interstate pile up
and it tickles me pink
that i can make you pay
for every tear i ever cried
for the sake of love

i no longer care that people
look at me as if i kick puppies
in my spare time
all they need to know is your my bitch
and i deserve to enjoy
every minute
of happiness i can get
even if its at the expense of yours
you made me miserable for years
shouldnt i experience some
emotion besides heartache

Damnit i love you
and i dont know why i hurt you
i`m just pushing away what i
always wanted
and eventually you`ll leave me
even though you cross
your XheartX
i`ll have you hoping to die
even i get tired of my I`m sorrys
when they`re nothing but a lie