I think I'm addicted to pain pills

I can't say exactly when the feeling started. Was it the day I came home from a 12 hour shift to a filthy house while my husband watched tv and expected dinner to be served to him? Or was it when I realized that I had just turned 20 And was stuck in a rut that I just couldn't claw myself out of.

No, I don't know when it started, yet the feeling remained longer than I care to remember; my life was not enough. I needed more. I needed to just be me! I needed not to have EVERYONE depend on me.

Maybe this confused vulnerability I wore with confidence gave him the courage to press forward and break the flirtatious boundries of our frail friendship. In the course of only a few hours, he changed my life forever. He was the only man I had been attracted to since meeting my husband four years earlier. He was gorgeous and strongly determined. A brilliant conversationalist by anyones standards. Seduced me with his words and the desire he tried to smother in his eyes. Give him credit for trying to stop the inevitable. And tentavely he put his trembling arms around me and softly kissed my lips. His trembling seemed contagious and my knees became weak. All those silly cliches we used to laugh at were now applying to me for the first time. I was lost in our passion, felt like I had swallowed a whole bottle of vicodin. This couldn't be happening to me; to both of us. We were both happily married, weren't we?!!

Why did he have to taste so sweet and feel so good in my arms? Why did I become so wet just feeling his hard cock poke against my body? Our hands explored faster and faster, left unsatisfied by the challenges of confining clothing.

And weeks flew by, studded with secret meetings and stolen kisses, sinful words that make me euphoric.
But we both knew it couldnt last and he was always wiser.

Seeing him after that was pure torture. The feelings were still there between us, we could never deny that. Such a passionate awkwardness drowned us and it seemed everyone was oblivious.