To Say Good Bye To You

The mornings sun first rays of light
peek around the mountains
casting shadows on
the events
that took place just last night
falling into my soft bed
my day finished
our friendship dead
as I put aside my anger
I pause to wonder
how we suddenly diminished
into nothing
nothing
at
all

My heart breaks like thunder
crashing
in the distance of my hollow soul

When did you build that wall
has it been there all along
I never knew of its existence
but
I guess I could be wrong

Latly I've felt the need to crawl
to take refuge in my hole
hiding away from your contempt
and
it seems you felt the same as me
only you took refuge in your tower
a million miles above me

Feels like you've been gone forever
Yet its only been an hour
I expected that I'd miss you
just not to this extent
true friends I've found
are far and few
So I guess
that I resent
having no one to talk to
who will listen to me vent
or sit beside me while I cry
and
understand why Im upset

Maybe we just got too high
or
maybe not high enough
still I do regret
all the fucked up things I said
you just acted oh so tough
as you ripped to shreds
the last little bit of respect
that we had between us
now as I sit back and reflect
its hard to even believe us
this mess
that we created
and
I'm starting to realize
just what it is we lost
behind being irritated

A friendship that was special
although in its own little way
seemed almost to be fated
when we began to play
what we had was based on trust
and
staying real with one another
definatly not on lust
or
just having to deal with eachother

I'm sorry I implied
that you were out to cheat me
it just seemed
the more I tried
the more you refused to meet me

Maybe theres a reason
the drugs have replaced the hugs
or
maybe its just the season
the chill in the air
causing ice water to run through your frigid viens

Is it really that much easier
to pretend
you have no feelings
you claim you just don't care
that you dont want to hear
anything I have to say
do you really intend
on being that unfair
as you turn your back
and
walk away

This cant be you
the man I knew
who took great pains to be aware
how I was effected
he excepted me as I came
and
never disrespected

I refuse
to just sit here
while our friendship
is ruined by issues
I will fight
and
yell
and
scream
and
spit
but
Ill never ever dis you

I wont deny
my tendency to be a lttle extream
I wont withhold
or
be controlled
but
Ill always be down for the team

I admit that Im a handful
at times a little bit too needy
still the good
far exceeds the bad
and
you could never say I'm greedy

So I contend
that I will defend
and
fight
for what I think
is right
but
Ill be your friend
through thick and thin
never again will I lose sight
of the fact
that
no matter how high I get
or
what drugs I do
it still hurts deep down inside
to say good bye to you