I am Unfathomable to You - The Condition is not Mutual

I am Unfathomable to You - But the condition is not Mutual

You think you can determine what I need? By what criteria do you come to this conclusion?
Perhaps you are enthralled by some illusion that my evolution followed by that standard delusion known as a "childhood"
Take me for a spell on the milestones, markers and interludes that you can decipher from a natural-born apprenticeship of indentured servitude?

I conceal my needs - suppress desires as I have been taught at terrible cost nothing is more necessary - than a more temporary wont.
When I choose to humble my arrogance to plead for patronage it is at a point where no other solution is possible to obtain.
Which is quite an accomplishment for a mind endowed with my circumrotated brain.

So when you deny me my humble request - you reveal your selfishness. Only to yourself are you significant - because I never ask for anything. But when I do, it's long past momentary vain affluence. I immediately withdraw the request because begging does not beget behest.

Irregardless unendowed with the requisite intensity of perception trained by years of infinitesimal sensitivity that knows frivality from function. My bray intentionally crafted that its reception is obsequiously subtle yet so clear to the discerning ear.

I cognize lament that on you I cannot become dependent and must again face another failure in a vain attempt to escape the solitude of my existence. A man without constituents.

You will never be capable of taking care of me - because you can't understand true need indeed. Your innermost desires and needs are translucent to me. Forever, you will be a burden to me. You are clever in the absence of empathy.

You do not even realize, the power over you that I can materialize but choose not to?

I wanted at least an equal - but that was a romantic notion to seek for. I've learned too many times to doubt my asininity.

No matter what path I tread somehow I manage to back to this wasteland of dread.

The end has begun before the race is run, when clever you think you've found a way - some secret you can keep at bay like so many before you. The forbidden fruit to finally to tip the balance between heart and mind prevailing on the brain it is time to be permanently parted and start this insane hell of repetition yet again...