Little Heart

It's the lonely nights
that hurt so bad.
I toss and turn
hoping for something to
make me fall asleep.

It's the bright sunny days
that kill me the most
because there's nothing
to fill the emptiness inside
my shattered heart.

Laying awake
in the middle of the night,
my thoughts are haunted
by 'what if's and 'why's.
There never comes an answer.

When will this just end,
so I can't cry any more tears
no more heart-wrenching worries
and soul-stopping agonies.
It's got to stop sometime.

I can't hold on to
my courage or my hope
for another go-round.
There's nothing to say
he won't end it all anyway.

Why not just
save my misery and
my sorrow
for another rainy day
where sorrow can be expected.

I just can't let go
of him because it would be better
I can't stop caring
because it may save him.
I'll just end up being his death.

Hollow and heavy-laden
i'm resigned to
going on to another war
with another heavy heart
not knowing the battle outcome.

Is it always this way?
Your heart getting
tossed in the way
and getting freight-trained
like it's just another train track.

It fades with time
as fight after fight
come into play
and fade out like
an evening into a day.

Pain becomes an everyday
occurance that you get used to
and never even notice.
It's just another part of
the life we lead.

Sleep now little heart
the end is soon to come.
Little girl,
all will be well with
the ones you love.

I'll sing you a lullaby
to drift you off to sleep,
a dream-laced place
to ease anxiety and fear
for a little bit.