Clarity

An apology with out request
could put all this to rest
Shock leads to fear
leads to
recognition leads to indicition
and
Grows in to contempt
Contempt for you for us
but
Most of all contempt for myself
Reasons are many
too many to list
Each one of them being relevant
These feelings have been festering
Digging deep in to my concience
Until they just become a part of me
A part of us
The part of us that is driving us
Apart
Unnoticable at first
but
Still so very real
Truth
My subconcience is full of the truth
The truth about you
About me
The truth of how I really must feel about myself
To be tied to this contempt
Its safe
Safe not to expect too much
To save the dissapointment
for when the finale masks are lifted
and
The truth rears its ugly head
When I see you for what you truly are
In you I see myself with calrity
but
I'm not so sure I like what I see
So I put my mask back on
The one with the big blue eyes
that refuse to see
The light of clarity hurts too much
so to blindness I retreat
As I hide with in this role
Maybe some day
I'll become this role
and
In your theater of lies I will perform
Who ever it is
I
think
I
am