Dear Bethany Pt 1

Dear Bethany,

It's been one day since they forced you to leave and I miss your already. Today in gym we played basketball; remember how much I suck. I still do. Actually I did better without you there because I wasn't afraid of your judgment anymore.Jeremy told me this theory of pretending the basketball were his balls and the backboard was Autumn's face. If she was here I doubt she would appreciate it. I tried the same with you and I'm sure if you were here you would slap me for being so disrespectful. It really just threw off my game. Jeremy said you should be back in a few weeks, but I don't know.

I found myself staring at your empty seat in calculus and ended up being sent into the hall; what are we fifth graders? When I came back in I lied and said I forgot my contacts and sat up front in your seat tracing the little etchings you made in the desk. Kelly seemed little upset that I was so upset and asked me if I would feel the same for her. She doesn't know about us. You're lucky i remembered that last second. I know we are exact opposites so this is kind of hard for anyone to understand how we could work... You know, because your beautiful, skinny, short but hey it's cute; while I'm tall, husky, and average. I don't know... I'm not good about talking about my feelings it makes me feel like I'm naked. Like that one time I came to school without underpants on and a hole in my pants. You laughed and I had to wear your favorite hoodie around myself for the rest of the day. I wore those pants again today by accident only difference is this time I had no jacket to wrap around myself, well that and I was wearing boxers so it wasn't half as nasty.

I also remember when we started talking, I  was such a perv the year before and you hated to talk to me. This year I got better and with your help I got up to my true potential, sorta sad that's at your level. Just kidding, you probably smarter than I ever will be. I just wish you had been smarter that day with those deals. Just because they wanted it doesn't mean you should give it to them. I still have the last one in my backpack and I just hope it doesn't break before i dispose of it. Today in science Mr. King made fun of me saying I was flirting with Danielle, but I wasn't I swear. I was almost yelling in response, but kept in mind that if I was gone who would be here to welcome you back? Whatever let's just say he is my least favorite teacher now. Then right after that, the power went out and all hell broke loose. It was terrible, but who knows maybe I'm just overreacting as usual. Then a fight broke out in the hallways, more bombs were thrown, and our principal quit. I like to think without you the hell is dancing through the hallways of Pandora's box. Then even worse later on the bus Alan started talking to me; remember how bad he was for the both of us? I don't want to be mean though so I talked back and I actually found myself falling into his trap again. He was talking about how Ken kept trying to fight him over a pair of shoes, bet you would of loved to see her get beat up by a midget. So would I, to be honest. I wish you would of sat next to me instead of Kelly who was talking about you badly the whole time. This whole day was a mess and I wish I could of witnessed one of those laughs, one of your jokes, or one of those stupid faces you make that I pretend to hate. Or here you talking to me in that cute south Dakota accent that sounds so different from my deep southern one. Your phone went straight to voice mail and your email is filled to the brim, but I suppose I'll write this letter just in case. Bethany, I don't know how long your going to be gone, but please come back to me.

With the sort of love dark things deserve,
Alex