one last haunting...

voice and smile shaky
the tremors in her hands
the air tank in the corner
just finished a game of rummy
she won, of course
she always won
just like the cribbage games
that I had to re-learn each time

my plate of cinnamon toast she made, lovingly
was empty
my glass of milk she made, feebly
no longer half-full
these I finished off, not hastily
as I hoped deep down
to make the moment last
and last
and last some more

we hugged
a loving hug, a longing hug
a hug of desperation
a hug of -- remembrance

then she sobbed, quietly
and I wept, openly

she knew, I knew, we both knew
I saw it in her tear-filled eyes as she said
"Come back to visit soon"
soon wouldn't be enough
she was losing that battle
and to her, that meant
losing her memories of me
of that particular point,
we were both acutely aware

I did not see her again
or rather
I failed to see her --
I accept that judgment

and now I hold that
one last memory
that one last hug, that
one last haunting
frame in time
close and dear

as all the other joys
simply fade away...