I Caught You
By Crysa
I caught you, spying on my dreams,
lurking behind my stardom.
I caught you red-handed, yet you denied...
"I saw nothing", you said with you finger between "writer" and "wings".
You were peering through my filed hopes,
picking each one apart, and catching you,
it makes a difference, you knowing, it changes me.
"Wings?" you scoff, as I try to pull them away.
"Think you'd like to fly, eh?" laughing, you read aloud,
"to have nothing but air surround me,
flying high above the world, my escape..."
I hate when you do that, ridicule and mock me.
I caught you spying on my dreams,
I reached to push you away, you dodged and tripped me,
" What?, won't you share?" and I scream,
"No! These dreams are MINE!" you smile, and rip them into shreds, letting
them flutter down around me.
"You're dreams haven't wings." you say as you walk away.
Grasping the scraps at my feet, I smile through the tears,
because these are just the dreams in my head,
and you've no idea of the dreams in my heart.
Comments on "I Caught You"
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On Saturday, October 15, 2005, blue
(1409) wrote:
Ahh.. this was just such a wonderful display.. and, I'll have to agree with Dr. Ben on that account.. I was thinking of personal matters this pointed to while reading it. Great work. Great ending. ~b
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On Wednesday, September 28, 2005, Dr Benway
(48) wrote:
I love really personal poems like this. Instead of trying to figure out what the person was trying to say, I try and find my own meaning in them. This one painted some pretty vivid pictures in my head. So, thank you.
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On Saturday, September 24, 2005, peril_notion
(87) wrote:
Wow... I'm delighted that I stumbled upon your works. Very intriguing style and mindframe. Keep it up. ~Heather
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On Wednesday, September 21, 2005, girlafraid
(479) wrote:
this is devastating...but the last line is inspiring...what a wonderful piece.
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On Wednesday, September 21, 2005, MESUN
(230) wrote:
this is beautiful. no one can stop your heart. dreams are life.
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A former member wrote:
What would I do in this specific poem? You use a lot of dialogue and that seems to be the through line and life blood to this piece, so I'd put more emphasis on that and less on the rhyme scheme and structure, make it a scene, use your senses to describe
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A former member wrote:
what they're doing and where they are, even if it's metaphorical bring the image.