Broken road

As I look back on that broken road
I find cracks that are left unsealed
I stand in the footprints of a life alone
My memories of the past are abusively real

This road swerves full circle
Depression and angst race through it's maze
I have no tolerance for the hopeful
So I resort to living in a chemical haze

If wanted to be suffocated by negativity
Then I'd crwal deep inside myself
An emotional coma is all I chose to need
Since the hatred and pain were already dealt

I never asked for salvation
And I pray that I never will
Cause I love the abusive high of devastation
I love, hate, and die in one pill

It's a love-hate relationship
I kill for the comatose relaxation
And I crawl along with the down trip
Cause reality prevails over every sensation

So this is what's become of me
Disorders and drugs run through my blood
I hope no one ever has to feel the shame
That I feel when the high is done