(or pulling the plug from the dam)

waiting
always waiting
we’re always waiting
for what?
why do we sit here?
thumbs either twiddling
or up our asses

abiding
always abiding
we’re always abiding our time
we all harbor the power
to do & say & create
anything we want
but we don’t
we’re scared
why?

we all are amazing
but we hide

in chat rooms
and through text messages
we spill our guts
bare our souls
but no one really sees

we need
need
we fucking need
& must
must shut off the computer
smash those fucking phones
against the wall
and grabs our books of written word
& make them spoken

stand on our roofs and yell
“i am here!”
“this is what i have to say!”

i look back at history
at everyone who made a difference
or started a generation
kerouac & ginsberg
& all those beat cats
they were around my age
when they changed society
they completely shattered
all of the rules of writing
but what was it about them?
why were they the ones to do it?
because they were so smart?
they were smarter than me
that’s true
was it because they were talented?
perhaps, once again, they were
more talented than i’ll ever be
but there were and are
millions of people
smarter & more talented
than them
so how did they do what they did?
what was it?

it was guts & balls
they were fearless
completely unafraid
they just did what they did
& said what they had to say
not caring about perception
or about what is correct or not
they weren’t afraid of their weaknesses
completely unashamed of what they were
either alcoholics, druggies,
or queers
they had the strength to say
what they felt they should
that is why there are remembered
& that is/was why they were great

are you great?
can you be?
or are you still afraid?
can you log off
& go to a poetry reading?
or submit your work to a publisher?
or let a peer take a look?

i wanna be great
& i’m ever so slowly
gaining that courage
to step into the world
with my thoughts & words blazing
i wanna change this place
& if i fail okay
but i’ll fail trying
rather than be
a failure while hiding