Drifter

Raindrops crash around me
Flooding my soul and drowning
My will to go on living
Without you in my life

Thunder claps overhead
Pulse through my body
Rattling my aching bones
Shaking my naked flesh

Lightning flashes in the distance
Making shadows chase each other
On the walls of my memories
Of what we used to have

A distant past not forgotten
Often thought about and missed
For all it’s worth and beauty
Left stranded in time and space

Promising ourselves that one day
Maybe one day we will be together
Sharing our hearts and bodies
In ways we have only spoken of discreetly

You’re the Alpha to my Omega
Or maybe it’s the other way around
But who cares really
You’re my better half gone missing

Roaming this place of abandonment
With my heart on a leash
To drag through the mud and the muck
While it’s tread wears thin

This heart of mine has taken a beating
Been to hell and back and then again
Constantly tormented and tried
For all it has to give

Anger and fear set in while I, me
Kick myself for my mistakes
Blaming myself for everything
Gone wrong in my life

Random songs and a bottomless bottle
Seem to get me through
Most of the time
But lately I don’t want it

I’m not even good enough
To save the skin on my back
While I grow older by the second
And the reality of life sets in

I am destined to roam alone
Consuming my solitude
One labored breath after another
As I watch through the window

Staring into your beautiful life
And I’m freezing out here
While he warms your soul
I’m left to petrify

I’m but a hollow of my existence
A ghastly corpse of emotion
In an athlete’s body
But my mind has checked out

I think I saw it once
Vacationing in my pupils
While dilating in the bright light
Shed by your heavenly glow

Or perhaps that was a reflection
Too hard to tell these days
Everything looks the same
In shades of grey and white

And there you are
The rose petal in the static
As vivid as life itself
Absolutely untouchable

You quiver and stare
Through that window I’m looking in
For a fleeting instant
You recognize me

I feel a heat creep into my soul
A small flame like a lighter
Burning brightly in my core
And I take a breath

You turn away and my breath
Extinguishes the flame
But I got your attention
I whisper softly to the window

For what it’s worth….I love you.