Even the blind see

By waterchica999

She closed her eyes trying to
determine the sins of her actions
while finding her inner being
and trying not to corrupt the world
with her evil being
but once inside
she found more then pain,
then hate,
then the beaten girl
who can't let go
and the soul who apologizes
once to much
and plasters a smile that never reaches
her once alive beautiful eyes
Then She opened her eyes and saw
Nothing had changed...

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
© 2007 waterchica999
Published on Thursday, September 27, 2007.     Filed under: "Poetry"
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Comments on "Even the blind see"

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  • A former member wrote: *than pain *than hate *than the beaten girl : otherwise, quite neatly done. The last line brings it home well- always sad to realise that no one will care unless you care yourself (at least that's what I got out of it) write on!

  • What Limes On Friday, September 28, 2007, What Limes (54)By person wrote:

    nice write. Your title gives too much away though... if that makes any sense, or if you even wanted feedback.

  • The Zebra Warrior On Friday, September 28, 2007, The Zebra Warrior (1495)By person wrote:

    plus the fact it's the Stanley Kubrick film title sort of impedes it...you might consider using " " to at least acknowledge, so as to avoid confusion...maybe? Or to separate from it....dunno

  • waterchica999 On Saturday, September 29, 2007, waterchica999 (29)By person wrote:

    thanks, I'm always looking for feedback eyes wide shut was all i could think of at the time but ur right and i like this one better

  • What Limes On Sunday, September 30, 2007, What Limes (54)By person wrote:

    well played...

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